Chapter Five

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            The Unification of Evil Ceremony was in full swing at Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated

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The Unification of Evil Ceremony was in full swing at Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated. Of course, the event played out more like a rave party than a conference for evil scientists. DJ Eggsy provided the music – a bunch of techno beats with some PSY thrown into the mix. It was a bizarre experience for Kim and Perry (and, by extension, Wade and Luther).

"These guys are seriously the world's most dangerous geniuses?" Luther cringed as he observed the gathering through the live feed on the surveillance cameras inside Doofenshmirtz's lab.

Wade, on the other hand, was more focused over one absent attendee. "Still no sign of Ernst Blofeld. Are we sure he's even coming?"

"Wouldn't blame him if he didn't," Luther said.

"Maybe he's just fashionably late?" Kim suggested. Every time she spoke with Doofenshmirtz's scratchy voice, she subconsciously felt the need to clear her throat. The latex mask was smothering as well, adding to the discomfort. If this was what it felt like being Heinz Doofenshmirtz, she pitied the poor guy.

"A'ight, luvs and bruvs!" DJ Eggsy's voice boomed throughout the room from the microphone attached to his turntable. "We're gonna take it old school with a Soul Train style dance line!"

            "Seriously?!" Luther bellowed, sounding slightly offended

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"Seriously?!" Luther bellowed, sounding slightly offended.

The evil scientists formed two lines with a space in the middle for dancers to strut down and dance in consecutive order. One scientist – a bald man with a piercing stare beneath a pair of horn-rimmed glasses – performed a ballet dance while looking in Kim's direction and challenging her.

"Bet you wish you could have moves this good, Heinz," he said.

Kim could only snicker and remark, "Are you for real?"

"I've never been more 'real'!" the bald scientist scoffed.

Turning her head, Kim pretended to look as if she was coughing while asking Wade and Luther, "Who even is this guy?"

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