Secrets Within the Family

1

Four Months Later
Tuesday, April 3

I tossed and turned, eventually giving up on sleep and lying on my back, staring up at the ceiling. Shadows of the cars below flickering, the sky an eerie blue. Every time I did sleep, nightmares plagued my mind, where reality twisted into a surreal canvas of fear and uncertainty. I wake up in cold sweats, gasping for air, and sometimes blood-curdling screams escape from my mouth. Those were the nights Cameron or Sebastian would coax me awake, after running into my room. After a few months of nightmares, they had gotten used to staying with me at night. Though they were never annoyed or frustrated, always gentle and kind.

It made me feel like a burden. I was beyond repair. I made it look like I was okay, like I was healing from the trauma I'd endured but I was drowning, fraying like a thread under too much stress. I couldn't get over the pain of losing my brother.

I missed Ashton so much, his absence from my life was too painful to bear. It was hard to live when a piece of me was missing. I didn't want to exist in a world without Ashton.

I blinked, taking in a deep breath and reached over to rub Hazel. She perked up, leaning into my touch, and licked my hand. After a few moments, she sat up and whimpered, something she did when she needed to go outside.

"Okay, okay," I murmured, ripping the blankets from my body and hauling myself out of bed. "Harry, are you coming?"

Harry kept snoring at the foot of my bed. He loved sleeping. I leaned down and kissed his nose as Hazel jumped off the bed and went to the door, nudging it open with her paw. She trotted into the hallway, her nails clicking against the wooden floor.

I followed her, hearing voices floating from the kitchen. Cameron was sprawled out on the couch, laptop in his hand. He glanced up and noticed me, straightening.

"Why are you up so early? It's ... 5:34," he said, checking his watch. He squinted, worry crossing his expression.

I shrugged, pulled the fridge door open and took a bottle of water. "I could ask you the same thing."

He stood up, placed his laptop on the coffee table and walked to the island counter, leaning on his elbows. "Why are you awake, Maisie? Did you have a nightmare?"

I focused on sipping my water. "What would make you think that?"

"Mase ... don't, just tell me what's going on."

I sighed. "I couldn't sleep, Cam. That's why I'm awake."

"You couldn't sleep?"

I groaned. "I'm okay."

"Maisie."

"Cameron."

He gave me a look and shook his head. "Just answer my question, Maisie," he murmured, becoming impatient. "Why can't you sleep?"

"I couldn't sleep ... my head, it's just ..." I motioned around my head. "I can't turn off the noise."

"Why didn't you come to me or Sebastian?" He asked quietly.

"I can't come to you with every little problem I have, Cam."

"Yes, you can," he said, smiling slightly. "I'm your brother, that's what I'm here for."

I sighed, nodding. "I'll tell you next time." He relaxed a bit. "Now, why are you awake?"

"I picked Chance and Milo up from the airport. They're in the spare bedroom, sleeping."

"Oh. Where were they?"

"On business for Denver ... I -"

Hazel barked, pawing at the front door. I set my water down on the granite counter.