Learning to Remember

19. Ohhhh!

An hour later, Amelia was driving her sister to the airport.  "Jovie, I don't understand why you have to leave so soon.   You had promised you'd stay for at least two weeks after I got back. It's been way too long since we spent real quality time together."

"I know, Millie, I'm sorry.  I just couldn't afford to turn this job down.  I'll only be gone a couple weeks. I'll come back then to spend time with you. I promise."

"Do you have to leave right now?  Can't you stay a few more hours?"

"I'm sorry." She shook her head. "Thanks for driving me over from the rental car dealership, you didn't have to.  They have a shuttle to the airport."

Amelia scoffed. "Of course.  I wanted to spend every second with you that I could."

"I'm sorry, Mills. I promise I'll make it up to you."

"I'll hold you to that, Jovie."

"I have to go." Jovie leaned forward and hugged her sister for a long time.  "And Millie?" She said as she pulled away and looked her sister in the eye. "Promise me you'll attempt to make some friends here.  It's been long enough and I worry about you."

"You know why that's hard for me, Jovie." Amelia sighed.  "Jovie, why are you tearing up?   I'm ok, I promise."

"I just love you so much." She hugged her again, but quickly this time.  "I'll text you when I land in New York."

"Make sure you do."  Amelia waved at her sister as she went through security.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

John couldn't sit still.  He'd gone for a grueling run and didn't come home until his legs felt like complete jello.   He'd finished packing for the long weekend trip he'd begged Gabe to go on with him. But Gabe couldn't leave until tomorrow morning and now he was sitting inside his house with nothing to focus his pent up energy on.  

He had tried everything he could think of to rid his mind of the woman next door, but nothing worked.  She had made her feelings extremely clear last night but this morning she had seemed confused.  There was a moment this morning when her eyes seemed so soft and vulnerable and he had almost let his guard down and reached out to her. But fear won him over.  He wasn't sure if he could handle her rejection a third time.  And he wasn't the type of man who pushed a woman after she so clearly said no.

With a glass of water and some snacks, he planted himself on the couch and decided to try and occupy his mind by watching a movie.  As he flipped through the live channels, his fingers paused when an image of Emma Watson dressed as Belle came onto the screen. Images of his short, blonde neighbor singing and dancing in the middle of the animal enclosures in the park filled his mind. He knew he should move to another channel and watch something else, but he seemed frozen in place as he continued watching the movie.

Half an hour later, his snacks and water untouched, he watched as the beast let Belle go to take care of her father and the magical teapot said he let her go because he loved her.  John felt his chest tighten at the words.   He watched as the beat began to sing his feelings.

"I'll never shake away the pain.

I close my eyes but she's still there..."

John exhaled as he closed his eyes and listened to the words, memories of the last two weeks flooding through him.

"It's more than I can bear.

Now I know she'll never leave me, even as she runs away.

She will still torment me, calm me, hurt me, move me, come what may.