Hide and Seek

Game

No.

No, no, no, no, no, no, NO.

It can't be.

This can't be happening.

I must be wrong.

I'm not wrong. That scent. That voice. My stomach clenching when I heard it.

My mate.

My mate.

Shit. Motherf*%!*& shit.

Does he know? Maybe the suppressant didn't work? Oh God, did he scent me, the way I scented him? Did he?

Damn, damn, damn, damn.

This can't be happening.

I felt myself get dizzy and tried to slow my breathing down. I was seriously hyperventilating, my head felt like it was about to explode, too many thoughts and feelings rushing through.

What the hell.

Damian was my mate?!?!?!????????????

Damian was my mate.

I had a mate, damn it.

I banged my head back against the wall a few times.

Of all the fucking bad luck.

I'd gone 7 years, 7 YEARS, with no sign of a mate. And now this.

Damn it all to hell.

I closed my eyes as I felt myself starting to spiral again. I couldn't afford to lose control now, not with him in the next room, not when I had to see him every day for the next week. Oh God, I had to see him every day for the next week.

Stop, I told myself, just stop. He doesn't know. If he did, you think you'd be here? He wouldn't have allowed you out of the room. He doesn't know. The suppressant really works. You're safe. You're safe.

I felt the building panic abate a little. When I was a little calmer, I opened my eyes and slowly got up. When under stress, I herbed. I took a deep breath and went straight to my work counter and began to sort the herbs I'd collected last night, focusing on the plants and trying to keep my hands from shaking. I had an ointment to prepare, a meal plan to set up for my patient (mate, my mind whispered) and other things to do.

***

It took the best part of an hour, a lot of productivity and a lot of talking in my head for my hands to stop shaking.

If I managed this well, no one would know, not him, not anyone else. I could do it, I had plenty of practice in staying under the radar. Granted, I'd never been in close proximity to my mate till now and I hadn't even known how well the suppressant would work. But it was working, obviously, and that was a huge relief. Now, I just had to be careful. I had worked it all out. Minimise interaction with him, spend only what time was necessary as a Healer and send him on his way at the end of the week. With luck, I wouldn't have to see him again - I mean, I hadn't bumped into him all these years, it was unlikely I'd do so again once he had returned to Clanholme. You'll never meet him again, Ri.

Never meet him again...

I didn't want to feel this, but there was a curiousity in me about him. He was my mate, I wondered what he was like. But I knew that was just the mate attraction talking and I knew better than to allow that in.