What We Become | Book Two

11. Life

Every few moments a groan would escape her lips. Each one held a raw quality to it which knew no end or limit. Her body twitched and spasmed in the passenger seat as the engine rumbled beneath us, roaring its own tune. From the fleeting glances I took, her eyes seemed to dance beneath her lids, blinking as shapes raced beyond the windshield.

If my plan failed, she would never be able to look at the world in the same way. The world she had started to appreciate again.

The sky was looming a dark grey above, beginning to unleash its own fury. The rain danced on the glass before being pushed away by the wipers. I'd been on autopilot for most of the journey so when I reached the gates of Carnelian, my foot slammed on the brake.

"Ben?" Chris shouted from the platform.

"Open the fucking gate!" I screamed at him.

I felt a fury inside me; a rage that scorched and burned and I didn't even try to suppress it. I didn't want to.

My outburst caught him off guard and he jumped out of sight. Within a few moments, the gates pulled open revealing the town I never thought I'd see again so soon. I caught a glimpse of Chris' face as I pulled in. His narrowed eyes and questioning look said everything as he noticed the girl covered in blood in the passenger seat.

The car lurched as I yanked on the handbrake outside Will's house. The sound of the commotion had already caught his attention and he walked down the driveway towards me as I lifted Em from the truck.

"What's going on?" he questioned.

Another crowd had begun to gather, echoing gasps and muffled swearing resonating as they caught sight of the girl hanging limp and bloodied in my arms.

"Ben, what happened?" Will spoke again.

I shook my head as her body twitched. "I couldn't leave her..." I choked.

With no fear or hesitation, Will placed a firm hand across my shoulders and pulled me into the house, away from the prying eyes of the crowd.

*

"She can't stay here," Will uttered as we stared at her form on the bed. Her body had curled itself into something foetal, pulling every limb into herself. "Look at her, Ben. She's too far into the Transition already."

The pain was likely dominating her thoughts, blocking out every other sound in the room. It would be taking over her body and transforming her into something else, somebody I wouldn't recognise.

"I couldn't leave her," I repeated, trying to steady my failing voice. "If there's the slightest chance that a cure could exist, it means she doesn't have to die."

Chris' agitated words came from behind me. "Every life in Carnelian is now at risk because she's here," he spoke.

"You said there was no cure," Tom interjected from the doorway. "Why did you bring her here?" Some colour had returned to his skin but he looked tired, like the drama had woken him from a deep sleep.

"She's tied up," I countered. "She can't go anywhere. She's not strong enough."

My gaze wandered to her hands which were bound with rope to the headboard. Her feet were tied in the same pattern. I hadn't enjoyed doing it, but I understood what was happening enough to know it was necessary.

A piercing scream burst from her and the gargling that followed sounded like her throat was closing up. Her body tugged and writhed at the restrictions as her eyes became more wild, frantic with the realisation she couldn't move.

"Do you realise what you're doing to her?" Will asked, seeming almost unfazed by the sudden outburst.

"Yes," I acknowledged, not bothering to argue. "You don't need to try and guilt me. This is the worst thing that could possibly happen... The worst thing I could've imagined." I returned my focus to the girl on the bed. "But I lose her and I lose everything."

"You're torturing her," a female voice came from the corridor. Apollo's. "This isn't what she'd want. You know that."

"Fuck off, Lo," I spat. "Don't you make hot chocolate to fix problems?"

"Hey!" Tom shouted, pushing against me. "Just because you're pissed it doesn't mean you need to take it out on us."

"Then why don't any of you get it?" I pushed him back and he released his grip as he stumbled.

"Hey, hey, hey," Will pressed between us, narrowing a blue stare at me. "That's enough... This is selfish, Ben. You know that."

Their opinions may have been reasonable, and yet, I wanted to hear none of them. I took a step into the room, where nobody else had dared to cross into.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Chris said as I pushed the door shut behind me, closing out the voices that tried to argue what I already knew. "It's not safe in there!"

I took a step closer to the bed, trying to steady my breaths. "You probably think I'm the worst person in the world right now," I uttered, keeping my voice low.

Her skin had begun to pale and purple lines were beginning to lace her arms, darkening slowly. Broken groans escaped her barely parted lips and her eyes focused on everything in the room but me.

She was broken. No longer living and losing every second of life that still clung to her. There was a battle happening inside, between the virus and herself. The winner was already predetermined.

There was no pulling her out of this one.

"I can't lose you, Em," I said. "Shit..." I muttered. "I can't even justify this but it makes sense in my head... I have to try. I have to."

I caught her eyes as they lingered on mine for a second, long enough for me to see her. Except, it wasn't her. In her stare, there was fury. A seething hatred that burned into me. In her final human moments, she despised everything I was.

"I'm sorry, Em... Truly, I am," I whispered, taking a step backward towards the door. The crowd outside moved away as I pushed past them into the corridor.

"Where are you going?" Chris asked when I was halfway down the stairs.

"This needs to end. I'm going back to finish it."