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I think maybe the worst part of it all is that nearly all the tributes in here are famous. Obviously for the Capitol's enjoyment and to torture the districts, so that it still feels like it's they're children being in here. It's makes it even worse for us. Because we're all famous enough that if you really think hard enough you'll come up with a name.

I frowned. Hannah and Sam from District Eight. Children of Cecilia.  I can distinctly remember in one interview Hannah crying as a child because the Capitol people looked 'freaky'. Yet, I don't feel anything over what I did. No regrets or sympathy. It's just emptiness.

The same with District Eleven. I can't remember the boy's name but I've heard of Rebecca. The daughter of Chaff. She's labeled as a fashionista which is laughable considering she's from District Eleven. But I guess she's more Liam's guilt than mine. Doesn't matter that they're dead. Well to their districts and families it does. Maybe I'll feel something at the Victory tour if I ever make it out. I nodded to myself. Yep, there'd have to be something seriously wrong with me if I didn't feel anything on one of those tours. I frowned, if I didn't then I'd be no better than Finnick Odair...

I casted my eyes over to Liam. His head had rolled onto his shoulder and he had a small pool of drool on the side of lip. I snorted in amusement. The heartthrob of Panem drooling...I shrugged. A part of me thinks it's more adorable over gross. I shook my head at myself. Damn I've got it bad. A crush on Liam Odair, my ally. 

I shouldn't be thinking that way about him. He's a tribute which means under everything he's still competition. I bit my lip, competition that promised never to kill me. I couldn't deny that he is very aesthetically pleasing to the eye. From hair to the six pack under that tight fitting shirt. I guess that's his angle though, the son of two beautiful Victors would himself be beautiful. And he is. Startling so. 

And then there was that moment of weakness. Firelight glowing up our faces after being so raw and open for the first times in our lives. I blew out a shaky breath, it was only a moment of weakness. It was bound to happen. We're spending every waking minute together and we're living each day as it comes. Knowing today could be our last. 

But I felt more than surface level sexual attraction. I felt a connection. Someone who for the first time, besides Trent. Someone actually understood me and funnily enough could relate in almost every way. From my sickening fame to my perfect lie of a life. With Trent, he's a brother, my family. I could never see him like that. But Liam's different, different in the sense that he's...

Well, that's the thing. I don't know what he is to me. But I've never been so vulnerable around someone. And Liam makes me vulnerable in probably the best way possible. And I know now, especially after last night. I could never raise my axe to him. I could kill anyone in here expect my brother and the boy in-front of me who, for the first time trusts me so completely to allow himself to sleep like a baby. 

I'm supposed to wake him up for his watch. But I don't have the heart to do it. For two reasons. The first is that he hasn't been sleeping, not really. He'd never seen me use my axe except for a night ago. He's been staying awake with his eyes closed. So he needs it, more than I do. And then there's reason number two. A purely selfish reason. The fact that I can watch him sleep for days and never get bored of it. Watch his face relax and admire every little detail of him. I nodded, purely selfish. 

I hate this arena though. Sure it has a few trees and that's always a plus. But I don't like the way Liam feels in here. Which I think shows I'm getting way too attached to my ally. It's alway too hot or too cold. Never a decent temperature and there's too much going on. Mountains on one side, small woodland and a field of poison ivy?!?. Oh, and let's not forget Liam's source of water that's and I quote 'a surprise'. I frowned. I've already forgotten what year this arena is. I wonder who won it, probably someone from One or Two.

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