Forty-four

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The world is hazy.

There is screaming and shouting coming from somewhere around me, but I can't make anything out. It's as if I'm underwater trying to look out at the world, everything is muffled and all objects around me are just blurs of color.

What happened? The last thing I remember is being surrounded by the Lotus pack facing Caspian's wolf.

No that's not right, that's not the last thing, I was attacked.

Caspian had tackled me to the ground and bit me. There was so much pain and I can remember the feeling of the blood flowing from my shoulder. I turn to look but it seems fine. No pain as I rotate the joint and not even a hint that there was even blood involved.

Is this death? It's not as peaceful as I would have imagined. I would expect not to feel anything, not even fear. Yet, as I watch all the blurs around me, fear and confusion swirl within me until I can't tell which is which and I squeeze my eyes shut.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey.

A comfort washes over me, the peace that I had been expecting to come with my death has finally found me. My mothers' voice is so clear that I feel if I open my eyes she will be standing right in front of me.

I'm ready, I think to myself but before I can move something else breaks through the haze, through the peace.

The sound of my name is carried on the wind, so clear against the haze that my eyes snap open in response.

My mother is not in front of me as I had hoped nor had it been her who called my name. My head swivels, looking for anyone but all I see are the same faceless blurs moving around me.

Are these the previous Luna's coming to take me with them to the Moon Goddess?

I reach out hoping to touch them but the only thing that happens is the shouting gets a little clearer. It's still hard to make out words, but by the tone, something bad is happening.

I close my eyes as a shiver moves down my spine and when I open them, I wish I hadn't. I wish I had stayed in the peace of my mother singing to me and ignored the voice that called to me.

Two wolves fight viciously in the clearing, blood splattering onto the ground as they move. It's hard to tell which of the wolves has the upper hand, it could go either way.

Movement catches my eye and I turn just in time to watch Atticus shift into his wolf, his teeth glinting in the moonlight as a large black wolf runs at him.

And laying in the center of the clearing, undisturbed by the fighting wolves.... is me. For a second, the world freezes, the fighting wolves frozen in place as my head tilts and I take in my still form lying only a few feet away.

My skin is an odd grey, colored only with the blood that has completely soaked the delicate white lace of the dress. My hair is limp and unkempt around my head, and my mouth is slightly parted open.

Time snaps back, the growls and roars from the wolves as they fight, drowning out most of the other sounds. Someone appears next to my body, one hand pressing against my shoulder and the other hand feeling the side of my neck.

I wait to feel something. Pain or pressure from their hands but nothing happens. My head glances to my shoulder, no wound or blood but it is there right in front of me. Literally staring me in the face.

"Her heart is still beating, but it's faint," the person shouts, twisting to reach into a bag at their feet, and for the first time, I can see their face.

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