Rose Tinted (boyxboy)

Chapter 18: The meaning of love

"I didn't realise there were so many ways to love." 

☆

"Uno!" Tayce shouts rather excitedly as he puts his last but one card down. 

Max looks at the fan of cards in his hand. He hated this game and out of the six rounds they had played already, he hadn't won once! Not caring anymore, he puts down a random suitable card, knowing it will make no difference and sure enough, it didn't.

"I win!" Tayce says excitedly, putting both hands in the air, as if he hadn't won the five previous games. "Another round?" He looks hopefully at Max who just gives him the death glare. 

He gets up and heads for the kitchen. "I'm hungry. Do you want anything to eat?"

Tayce gets up from the floor, putting the cards on the coffee table and joins Max in the kitchen area, perching on one of the stools. "What do you have?" 

Max looks in the near barren cupboards. "A packet rice and a packet noodles, you choose." 

"Rice please." Tayce says smiling as he watches Max pull both foods from the cupboard and begins to prepare them. "You're a good host." He says, causing Max to snort at the compliment.

"Thanks." 

Silence now fills the space, with Tayce just watching on as Max boils a couple of pans of water ready to make the packets of food. "You know you are quite caring under that hard shell of yours! You're like a coconut." Tayce laughs at his own analogy.

"A coconut? Well I've been called many things, but never a coconut." Max smiles in amusement. 

"Why don't you show this side of you more?" Tayce wonders. 

"I don't want to give away all my secrets." Max says as he pours the flavouring of the rice into one of the pans. 

"There are some secrets worth revealing." Tayce replies with a smile, before it fades. "I knew Frank kept secrets...deep down I knew. He would tell me he would be going to meetings to see clients, but I knew he was sleeping with other people. But he would always come back. He had an answer for everything and because I love him and I thought he loved me, I would let it go."

"Love can do that to you, trust me." Max sighs as he breaks up and adds the dry noodles to the other pan. "It can blind you."

Tayce looks at Max, pondering on his words. "It sounds like you were in love once."

"I was." Max replies as he submerges the noodles in the pan. He says it so nonchalantly, that Tayce might have missed it if there were other distractions in the room. 

"You were?" 

"Yeah, why are you so surprised?" Max glances up from the pan to look at Tayce. 

"I'm not." Tayce replies, getting a little embarrassed by his own reaction. "What was his name?"

"Her name was Jinah." Max replies. 

"Oh, she was a woman...I'm sorry I didn't realise you were straight." Tayce says, embarrassing himself further.

"I'm not." Max replies.

"So...you are gay." Tayce responds.'" 

"No I'm not gay." Max says, now chuckling at the little hole Tayce is digging himself into.

"So, you're bi?" 

Max now puts down the wooden spoon on the counter. "Tayce, I don't really worry my head over the labels. I'm attracted to people...that's all, some are guys, some are girls, some are neither, some are both. If I feel that connection, then I'm attracted." 

Tayce now looked like his mind has been blown. "I didn't realise there were so many ways to love." 

Max smiles at Tayce's innocence. "There sure are and I'm telling you right now that Frank's kind of love isn't the best kind."

Tayce thinks on the words. Did Frank ever really love him? He begins to tap lightly on the countertop, he wanted to talk about it. "When I would go out, Frank would check who I was going with, he'd call and see if I was ok. I mean, you saw my phone the other night, I thought that was love. I thought that he missed me, was making sure I was ok. I see now that it wasn't love. That was possession, that was him wanting to control me. I honestly don't know what love is anymore." 

Max looks into the distance and sighs. "Love can make you feel all sorts of things, but when it's right, love is amazing." 

"I want to know what that's like." Tayce smiles weakly. "To feel love, real love." 

The air between them suddenly gets a little awkward, with the only sound being two simmering pans. Maybe it was too deep a conversation to have between new friends, or maybe it was something else?

Max looks at Tayce who has now moved back to the living areas and is gathering up the uno cards on the coffee table. Max was finding it all too easy to be himself around him. There was something about Tayce that made him want to care, want to protect, want to love....wait, love? "Shit!" The sudden realisation makes Max lose concentration, as he manages to catch his hand on one of the hot pans. 

Tayce looks up suddenly, seeing Max has a hold of his fingers on one of his hands. "What did you do?" He says dashing back over.

"I caught my hand." Max says, shaking his fingers. 

Tayce wastes no time in turning on the cold tap and guiding Max's hand under the flow. "Keep your hand under there for a bit." 

Max looks at Tayce's hands cupping his own and for some reason, it makes his heart beat just that little bit faster. Feeling a little taken aback by his own emotions, Max pulls his hand away from Tayce's grasp. "It's ok now." He lies, the fingers still stinging a little. 

"Well let me at least dish out our food." Tayce replies, turning his attention to the pans. Max now sits where Tayce was on the breakfast bar stool, with Tayce now opposite in the kitchen. Max still can't get his mind over his realisation, the fact that this new feeling he has towards Tayce is so ill timed and what the hell is he going to do about it?