Defrost my heart

Chapter 6 : Part 1

I wiped back, squinting in the direction where Jason and Bryan were standing, and realized that both had disappeared. Relieved, I sighed. Well, at least they are safe.

"What is there to see? Is there anything interesting?" Dean asked to get my attention back. Now I looked at the guys in front of me, "No! There isn't! What is your problem anyway? I don't even know you guys. So why are you like that to me?" I bravely faced them, but this question didn't make them think long because both of them started to laugh.

"Do you need reasons when you don't like someone?" Caleb looked at Dean questioningly.
"It's simple, If you don't like someone, you don't like that person. So no reason needed," Dean answered with a laugh.

It felt like a joke, but I turned away before making a stupid comment to worsen the situation and wanted to leave. Suddenly, they both grabbed my shoulder and pushed me backward; I banged the back of my head against the wall first. After that, my whole body started to shake. Unfortunately, this was the worst part of my body. The slightest shake to the back of my head brought me instant paranoia. Then, I heard a loud noise in my ears as the spot started throbbing. No! Please not now in front of these idiots.

They were building up in front of me; Caleb started insulting me while Dean roughly grabbed my face and shook it back and forth, examining it as if checking to see if I had an injury. I would have loved to push them, slap them, kick them between their legs! But I couldn't help but remain in a state of shock and try to control my body. I didn't want to break down in front of them.

"Why are you suddenly quiet?"
"Do you like our attention so much? Do you crave our attention?" Dean clenched his hand into a fist, placed it on my head, and then started knocking on it to ask if anyone was home.
"S-Stop it!"
"Haha, the naughty brat is stuttering. How cute," Caleb started laughing again.

I slowly regained control in my arms. Then, out of habit, I lifted them up to cover my ears. However, Caleb slapped them down. I was now dizzy while their faces kept blurring in front of me from Dean, Caleb, to Alex, my mother's boyfriend.

"You know, for being a cry baby, you still look hot. We should play with you sometime," Caleb's comment made me feel sick. I quickly wanted to flee again, but he dragged me to him, pulling my hair, and started laughing. Of course, their words were not new; I have heard worse from the guys. But still, when you hit me, it comes up; when you pester me, it all comes up again.

I finally didn't see these idiots in front of me anymore. It was now Alex who stood in front of me. How he was laughing, after having taken cocaine, with his fifth bottle of vodka in his one hand and his empty bottle in his other... How he beat on me even as the bottle broke, how my blood spread everywhere, how my body went numb. Desperately I closed my eyes.

That's not true anymore; Alex is not there! It's a figment of my imagination. Sadly, when I opened my eyes again, he was still standing before me, laughing, 'You are such a disgusting child! Why don't you scream!' I heard his voice loud and clear in my head. All my scars started to throb, trembling. I hugged myself, pressing very hard on the spot on my chest. In front of me, I only saw how my mother continued to sit expressionless on her sofa and took gulps from her bottle again and again. My blood was dripping everywhere.

That is not true.

Another slap, another laugh. 'Why were you born in the first place?!' Alex shouted. But then, I heard Dean's voice, "You are so ridiculous right now!" 
"Come on, let's film the crazy girl."
'You're useless; what a piece of crap! The only thing you're good at is relieving my boredom.'
My breathing became heavier. It's not true; it's just my imagination. I can't become like that again.
"J-J-J-Je veux...," I stammered to myself.
"Oh, you're talking in french now? Well, What do you need?" Dean snapped, grabbing my hair and pulling it so that my face was looking sideways at him. My eyes widened in shock because I now realized what I needed again. I needed the pills! If I took them, then I would feel better again. Yes, then I can forget everything! I need them again. Then I will be strong! Then I can protect myself. I NEED THEM NOW!