Didn't See That Coming | The Walking Dead(1)

Part 37 (Michonne)

Rick had come to check on Carl briefly in the morning, but he quickly went back down to the halls. He had spent the whole night clearing the last of the walkers from the other blocks, refusing anyone's offers to help. No one questioned him, he was grieving his wife. He needed time.

Maggie and Glenn had gone into town on a run for more baby formula whilst Daryl had taken Carl and Oscar down to the lower levels of the prison to do one last sweep for walkers or breeches.

CJ stayed up in the cell block. She was trying to keep her word to Lori by taking care of the baby. She was sat on her bunk, the baby in her arms as she fed her. It was calm, peaceful. After her talk with Carl last night, she felt a bit more confident that she could look out for them. She was still scared, and she was definitely not a mother, but she swore to herself that she'd be there no matter what.

That is a promise she will keep, for a very long time.

She couldn't help but feel that twinge of sadness when she remembered her inability to have children of her own. She had accepted it a long time ago. The accident that caused it happened back when she was only twenty-two. But looking down at this gorgeous baby girl in her arms, she was reminded of the confusion she felt when she was first told.

At the time, she didn't really have an opinion on whether or not she wanted kids, she still felt like a kid herself. But as she got older and worked with kids and had relationships and saw her friends all have kids, the fact that she would never have a family of her own got to her more. The scarring on her stomach just served as a constant reminder, even after she'd come to terms with the fact.

Breaking her out of her thoughts, the baby finished the bottle and whimpered when CJ pulled it away and put it down. "Shh, you're okay. You're okay, baby," she cooed as she gently rocked the newborn. "You want your daddy, don't you? He'll come and meet you soon enough. He's just... going through some stuff right now. Your brother will be back soon too. And your uncle Daryl. Until then, it's just me and you here. So please, don't cry too loud because I won't know what to do," she chuckled softly. "You know, when I was a baby, my mom used to sing to me. My dad told me that it was the only thing that would get me to sleep. Maybe I'll try that. Sing along if you know the words," she whispered with a giggle.

"I remember holdin' tight,
Felt like fallin', lookin' in your eyes,
I could hear it through the night,
Mornin' callin', sounds of sunrise..."

The baby stopped her cries and started to settle down. CJ couldn't help but smile at her. This baby was adorable. She already loved her.

"Wherever I may go,
Wherever I may go now,
Wherever I may go,
Your voice echoes so loud."

At this point, CJ's voice was barely a whisper. Even she couldn't hear herself by the last word. The baby was now fast asleep in her arms. CJ slowly got off the bed and went to put her down in the small bed of blankets. She heard the gate of the cell block open and smiled when she saw Carl, Daryl and Oscar come in.

"Is she okay?" Carl asked as he came over to check on the baby.

"She's fine, Carl," CJ smiled. "Fed her and only just put her down now," she explained before turning to Daryl. "All clear out there?"

"Yeah," he answered. "Took out one or two walkers, but lower levels are cleared up."

"That's great," CJ replied. "Can I talk to you for a sec?"

Daryl nodded and they went out into the lunch area. "You alright?" he asked

"Yeah, I'm fine," she nodded. "I just wanted to say thanks, you know, for yesterday. I uh... I really needed that cry," she chuckled, running her fingers through her hair.