Because Of You

Chapter 18

"It's officially begun, the 57th recon mission! Scouts, move out!" Erwin ordered from the front of the formation.

The weeks had flown by since the recruits arrived. They'd been given just the right amount of time to learn the formations and basic rules of expeditions, but Carmen didn't expect that to help them much. It was titan territory, meaning no matter what, there'd always be a death or two, no amount of preparation could properly prepare them for the outside world. The only reason she knew was because the MPs used to leave her outside the walls for a few hours to check her survival skills, and even then, expeditions were still nerve racking.

Usually, she tried to ignore whatever amounts of anxiety she felt when leaving the walls, but this time was different. Levi had warned her about this expedition, meaning it must have been crucial if he'd decided to trust the one person he saw as a threat. She still didn't know why he decided to inform her of the danger, but she was glad it allowed her to stay with the squad, so she didn't mind too much.

"Loaded question, and be straight with me." Eren decided to ask. "Do you think my friends have a shot at taking down a titan?"

"Really? I should certainly hope so, otherwise, what the hell have they been training for?" Oruo remarked. "Now listen and listen well. The time is now to choke back your fears an-" But before he could finish monologuing, his horse saved the day and made him bite his tongue, again.

"I'm surprised your tongue hasn't fallen off yet." Carmen commented through his anguish. "The point he was trying to make, was that you need to be aware. Don't let fear persuade you into masking worthless mistakes." She rephrased. "You're welcome."

"Oh, thanks." He quickly nodded his head. He didn't know how to communicate with Carmen. On the one hand, she often said things that could have been funny if she didn't say them with a completely straight face and monotone voice. But then again, Eren hadn't forgotten that she tried to kill him.

"Loosen up Eren, Carmen's just a softie at heart. She wouldn't hurt a fly." Petra chimed in, resulting in a few sceptical glances her way. "It's true though, right Oruo, you agree?"

He didn't, not after she broke his nose 3 times and gave him bruises the size of titans every time they fought. "Actually-"

"Remember how I promised never to break your nose again?" Carmen interrupted, causing Oruo to hesitantly nod his head. "I'd say that was rather kind of me, wouldn't you?" The statement clearly had underlying threatening tones, everyone could tell, but it was funny to see Oruo at a loss for words.

"Good one Carmen." Petra laughed when no one else did, making the assassin happy that someone saw the best in her, regardless if she wasn't actually trying to be funny that time. "See, nothing but a big, old, softie."

"I don't think she's any of those things." Eld countered.

"Yeah, but come to think of it, I don't even know much about you, Carmen." Gunther added, causing the rest of the squad to wonder the same thing.

"Well, I do." Petra smiled but most of the things Carmen had told her were lies, like her growing up in a small town in wall Rose where fighting was mandatory. And how she joined the scouts because she'd fallen out with her parents, in fact, nothing they knew about her was accurate. However, it was better than the brutal truth.

"As if, clearly I'm more accustomed to our reserved acquaintance. Wouldn't you agree?" Oruo argued.

"How about we make this interesting?" Eld decided, he was always on the more competitive side, and he had his fair share of conversations with her when they played chess. "Whoever knows the most about Carmen gets to be on her team during the next training session." He proposed.