The Tremendous Turmoil of Indigo

Chapter 10

Indigo breathed in the citronella and cayenne pepper infused air sitting in the Adirondack chair with Zane sleeping peacefully in her lap despite the repetitive clack of dominoes and the old school R&B booming in the backyard. Appetites were sated from the flavorful crawfish with its potatoes, cobbed corn sausages; along with the jambalaya, boudin balls, and empanadas. No one desired something sweet since Harrison supplied enough cakes and danishes from his shop to inflict everyone in the backyard with a cavity if they wished to visit a dentist next weekend.

Indigo looked at her watch knowing it was getting close to the time she had to gather her family and head home. One member was already ready to get in bed and from the looks of it Greer with her head resting in her Granny's lap was close behind her brother. Thyme on the other hand was next to Adira and Hazel's side dancing with the rest of the cousins, Aunts, Uncles and family friends that she attached the placed the titles in front of before speaking their names. Tate, Harrison, and Xavier weren't in sight which meant they were in the house, mostly likely in the game room shooting pool. No doubt Frost and Roan were with them on the PS5 with some of their other cousins that grew tired of the warmth of the Spring night or the mosquito that 'No Limit Soldier' their way passed the repellent torches.

"Dira seems happy." Indigo broke the bubble of quiet circling her and Saxon. "She moved past River not coming home for Spring Break."

"She's still upset." Saxon uncrossed her leg, shifted her body and recrossed her leg with the other one. "They were like oil and water. Now that he's out of the house. She misses him. She won't admit it but I know she does."

River had been away at Dillard University for the last two years. His senior year was a span of time she wasn't ready for. He was her first nephew and the first baby she ever held, burped, cradled to sleep. He was the reason she wanted to be a mother and crafted her into the parent she was today.

She understood Adira's longing to set eyes on the young man. Texts were cool and FaceTiming was an antidote of what she yearned but he was out in the world learning who he was—the kind of person he wanted to be, which was more important than her wanting to share the same space as her little dude.

"I'm letting her plan a trip to Fiesta Texas with her friends," Saxon added, peering blankly ahead at their cousin Chantel organizing everyone on the dance floor for the line dance that was about to commence once play was hit on the next song. "...a short road trip for her Spring Break. That seemed to pep her up." She flashed her sister a warm smile then placed her sight back on her only girl, not needing Chantel's second demonstration of the steps. Adira was a natural dancer; a former cheerleader and present majorette.

Indigo tapped Saxon's arm, "You remember the first solo road trip mama and daddy let us go on?"

"To Cancun." Saxon's smile swelled.

"That turned into El Paso." Indigo added and they both laughed, heads filling with distant memories of times when bills never crossed their minds and no one looked to them when they were hungry. "We should've never let Harrison talk us into using his car."

Harrison's first car was his pride and joy. Good on gas but had a mind of his own and three-fourths of the way to their destination it decided it didn't want to move anymore. Or maybe it was the oil change he neglected to get. Either way they never made it to the sandy beaches of Cancun. Instead they spent a day eating good food and discovering the natural charm of the Sun City until Beatrice arrived to take them home along with the smoking car fastened on a tow truck trailing behind them.

"We had fun, though." Saxon said, plainly. The humor drained from her face and Indigo eyed her with curiosity.

"Where did your mind just go?" Indigo softly stroking Zane's back.

"Moments like this..." Saxon gestured around them as the moon hung in the sky. "Are the true riches of life. And I am a wealthy woman." Her voice broke at the end of her words.

"Sax..." She gripped her sister's arm. "What is it?"

Saxon pulled in a deep breath, willed her emotions in check and wore a small smile. "It's back."

Two words were all she needed to say for Indigo to answer the reason the the melancholy the fell upon her just now.

"No." Indigo breathed out, gripping her arm tighter as if her touch to prevent the call of the grim reaper itself. "How has—"

"You're the only one I've told." Saxon quickly told. "Please, don't tell them."

She glanced at their mama, "I can't—"

"Please." Saxon begged, clutching the hand that was placed on her arm with desperation. "At least for the moment. She's..." She peered at Adira dancing and giggling at something her great uncle said as Thyme started doing her own dance off to the side. "They're so happy. I don't want to shatter that...until I know there's no coming back. Please."

Indigo swallowed hard, fighting back the tears that threatened to fall and her daughter's words came to her mind. "A sister secret." She held out her pinky.

Saxon hooked her pinky with hers. "A sister secret."

As they made the promise to each other Indigo felt the heat of someone's gaze upon her warm flesh. She didn't have to look up to know who was looking at them. She instinctively knew.