In Between Days: Raising Jordan (boyxman)✅

Kiss Off

Jordan

The Violent Femmes happened to be one of Tim's favorite bands of all time. He called Kiss Off his anthem, whatever that meant. Only a mother like ours would let a five year old listen to them; that's about when Mom first introduced him to the song. Only a mother like ours wouldn't get mad when her boys used the f-word because the f-word was often heard in the songs she listened to and if she listened to them then so did her boys.

"You're listening to the Violent Femmes, aren't you?" Tim said while driving to the group home. I was still annoyed Jamie didn't come with me. Either I must have been singing or I had the music so loud he could hear it over my headphones. Maybe both. "Let me listen, too."

Still annoyed, I chose not to answer him. I felt like telling Tim to "kiss off" right about now.

"Come on, don't be a dick," he said. "Get over it. Jamie's not going anywhere." Why did he have to bring up Jamie? Why did he even care?

I turned the volume up even louder so I definitely couldn't hear him. His lips moved, but I didn't know what he said. As I looked out the window, Tim shoved my shoulder to get my attention. I shoved him back, causing him to swerve a little.

"Fuck off," I said. He said something else, but I didn't hear him.

For this visit, Tim came out of the car with me. "Take off your headphones," he shouted. He didn't have to shout because I turned down the volume, but I still didn't answer nor did I take off my headphones. When I didn't take them off, he yanked them off without my permission, pissing me off more than I already was. As I went to reclaim them, he swatted my hand away. We fought back and forth for a minute or two, shoving and pushing.

"Is there a problem, boys?" Mom's favorite staff member, Betty, said. I was never sure how they knew she was Mom's favorite. I guess she was just more cooperative with her.

"Sit down," Tim ordered me, but I wasn't in the mood to listen to him.

"Or maybe you should come back a different time when you can act like men?" Betty said. Glaring at my ass hole brother, I reluctantly sat down on the picnic bench across from Mom. Her eyes stayed on Tim for a minute or two as if she recognized him. He hadn't sat on this bench in a long time.

"Hi, Mom," Tim said. "Jordan's in a bad mood because his...uh...friend didn't bring him so he's stuck with me."

Folding my arms over my chest, I sulked, staring at Mom who stared back at me, occasionally blinking. Tim never knew what to say because Mom never talked back.

"Art wants to take me to England," I said to her, but I wanted Tim to hear it, too. "If I go to England, I won't be able to visit you, but I don't think you care. I think you're dead inside." Tim elbowed me to shut me up. I elbowed him back and continued talking, anyway. "I used to see something in your eyes, but I don't see it anymore."

"Wait a minute," Tim said, looking at me. "What do you mean Art wants to take you to England?"

"Look," I said, handing him my phone, showing him all the numerous text messages Art sent me a couple of days ago. Because he paid my tuition and other expenses, he requested I save all my tests and papers so he could look at them, to make sure I spent his money well. So, to keep him off my back, I stored everything in a folder in his office. Tim didn't even know I did that.