Finding Her Again

1 - We are Hollywood

natalie

They're about to call my name. And I'm gonna have to go in front of 11 million people currently tuned in to the Emmy Awards. People are going to be paying attention to just me. I suppose that's what happens when you win an Emmy.

"And the Emmy Award for Outstanding lead actress in a Drama Series goes to," Kash Miller held up the Emmy statue, "Miss Natalie Matthews."

There it is.

I am not surprised I won. I was the fan favorite this year. That makes me sound conceited. I just know I did a good job in my most recent movie.

Layla won last year. She's very popular. She and Riley are dating. They met on the set of Spiderman. All of my friends are famous nowadays. I'm not complaining. They're all rather lovely.

Layla, Riley, Sofia, Jakob, and Jax.

Sofia is so hot. We made out last year at the MET.

I probably shouldn't be thinking about that as I'm going up to accept such an amazing award.

I picked up the edge of my blue dress. Cassie wrapped me in a hug. Layla pat my back as I walked past her.

I shook Kash's hand as he handed me the award.

"Wow, this is such an honor." It really was. I looked at the award, "When I was younger, I never knew this is where I would be. Even growing up, I never wanted to be an actress. I wanted to be a writer. And in some way, I accomplished that. Hell, I'm playing the main character in a movie based on my book." I scanned the crowd as they all laughed, "On a real note, I have to thank my co-stars," I looked over to where Layla was sitting with Riley, "Thank you Layla, you have been such a big help, an amazing friend, and a wonderful role model. I hope to be every bit the actress you are. Ms Angelina Jolie, my first girl crush. I have to thank my family. Especially my dad, who held me up and pushed me to be myself after my mothers death." I looked at the camera like I was instructed to do, "If you haven't yet, please go read or watch By My Side. It's what got me here today. Thank you all so so so much."

I held the award with two hands and walked back to sit next to my brother.

This is my fifth time visiting La since I moved out to New York. NYC is my home but La is amazing. I love award shows. And Cassie never turns down the opportunity to be surrounded by famous people.

"I don't know how you can keep your cool when Taylor Swift is sitting right there." She whispered in my ear, looking in the opposite direction.

Jennifer Lopez found me in the crowd. We've been close ever since I spilled wine on her at this after party for a movie I did 2 years ago.

"I am so beyond proud of you Natalie." She wrapped me in a hug, "So proud."

"Thank you Jen," I pulled away, "It means a lot coming from you.

She squeezed my hand, "You are brilliant."

She walked away.

"You just hugged JLO." Cass grabbed my hands, "I bet her skin was so soft."

I held back a laugh, "So soft."

"Outstanding job, Natalie." Brendan Fraser looked down at me, "I haven't seen a film that amazing in years."

"You're just saying that." He was one of my childhood crushes. George of the Jungle. Now he's one of my biggest role models.

"No, no. Genuinely. It showed the true struggles of the young lgbtq plus community." He nodded, "And to get such a profound actress a part of the community to play Rose- Brilliant."