My Darkening Ember

Chapter Fifty - Four

"Where were you off to?" An arm slithered across my shoulder nudging me toward their chest. It was still early morning but I was already tired and bruised from the training with Xander. The spinning move was the only shot I had gotten at him. The rest had been him tapping me on the sides or smacking me across my arms.

I shook from Mayra's grasp and wondered when she had come back. She fell into pace alongside me.

"Nowhere, everywhere. I was just exploring." I was a bad liar and she knew it.

She studied me, her eyes landing on the steel.

"With a dagger strapped to you?" Her voice was sweet as sugar but coated in suspicion.

"Yes," I tried convincingly.

"Elora," she stopped and so did I.

"You were gone yesterday. I know you returned, twice." She added the last word with a little extra attitude.

"You were gone too." I countered.

"I know you went to find Xander, beyond the capital walls," she cut me off in annoyance, probably because I kept lying.

I furrowed until I realized she could have followed me, or...

"You didn't,-" I began.

"You gave me no choice."

"You promised you wouldn't!" I almost hissed.

"No, I said I didn't want to but you forced my hand, and it was only for a few seconds. Your mind is weak when you sleep." She added as if that made anything better. I kept my betrayed look but I couldn't be mad, not really.

"Elora I told you to not get involved with him. And then you waltz beyond the capital walls with no idea what you're doing. Did you even bring a weapon?" Her eyes widened and from my silent response she threw up her hands, "Gods be damned you're such a fool."

My nostrils flared at that word, I might be a fool but I was tired of hearing it.

"Nothing happened."

"I followed you the second time," she cut in, and I turned away in annoyance.

"Well, then I don't have to explain, do I?" I hurried my pace but she caught up to me again with no problem.

"What about the poison in your veins? Why didn't you tell me? I could have helped."

"What can you do? Do you know a cure? No, and neither do I. All I know is either I survive it or I don't, and I've come this far. Nothing can be done now."

"Listen," she grabbed my arm, before winching, pulling her hand away as if remembering the since-healed wound I had shown her. "Father told me to look after you. If you get yourself killed because your grieving-,"

"The kingdom will lose its hope, I know. "

"No, you don't know. I don't care about the kingdom. My father does. I care about you, why won't you let me?"

The words stung, and I didn't know why. Hadn't I let her in? Hadn't I let my anger go? Maybe I hadn't.

"Your father sent me away, twice. He told me I would be safe, that I would die coming here, to the palace. But here I am, in the place he put me. I can't care for you the way you want me to because you remind me of deceit and broken truth when I look at you. It's broken and by the gods Mayra, I don't know how to mend it."

"You start there. With honesty." She swallowed and I saw her eyes glimmer. "I saw you in your dreams, hurting, and not just because of Selene. I felt what you did, the feeling of being unloved. That's cruel."