Beyond The Walls (NOW ON AMAZON!!!)

Surprise

"They mean you no harm, you know," Gram Lee, the elder, said walking up behind Hadley, startling her. "Brielle and the others are just teasing you because they're as curious about you as you are about them and it's their misguided way to try and connect with you."

It was a few hours after midnight and Hadley was sitting on a rock at the edge of the Wildling camp, looking up at the full moon. She was still finding it difficult to fall asleep. It wasn't just the heartburn and constant peeing. It was also the intense and incessant thoughts about everything and everyone she'd lost in the last few months brought to the fore by that conversation with Brielle, and the uncertainty of what was facing her with the Wildlings always rattling through her mind, keeping her awake.

"That doesn't make it hurt less," Hadley replied, scootching over to let the old woman join her on the rock and accepting a cup filled to the brim from her.

"I suppose it doesn't." Gram Lee said with a sigh. She clinked her own cup to the one she'd handed Hadley. Hadley stared at the cup's contents uncertainly. "Don't worry. Axel told me about your pregnancy – congratulations, by the way – so your cup is herbal tea to help with your aches and pains and to help you sleep, while mine is beautifully strong mead I made myself about four years ago that I hope will knock off more than a few brain cells along with my pesky aches and pains."

They sat in silence for a while sipping at their drinks. Hadley was a little jealous of Gram Lee's drink. She remembered the fire taste of alcohol and wouldn't have minded shutting her brain off for the night in a blackout. She'd sworn never to drink again after her very first hangover but the thought of reneging on that promise suddenly taunted her. She was suddenly desperate for the flighty feeling of nothingness that alcohol wrought. Desperate for the memories of the first time she was drunk. Memories of her, Ruq and Jamila dancing and laughing and joking without a care in the world. Hadley closed her eyes and let herself drown in the memory of that one perfect night.

"I'm sure you already know this, but I wanted to commend you on it anyway." Gram Lee said, breaking the silence. "You're a wonderful mother, Hadley. Your son is adorable."

Son.

It was one of those words Hadley hadn't heard before but was spoken like she should have.

"My son?"

"Your child. The little boy you arrived with? The one who won't leave the dog's side," the old woman clarified with a chuckle. "He's well mannered, he listens and he's always cheery. He's perfect. You'll have to do something about that vampire dog though. They won't allow him into The Caves."

"Brownie is great. They'll learn not to fear him eventually. He won't hurt a human." Hadley replied. "And Drew isn't my son."

"Hmm..." Gram Lee mused. "I've seen you with the little one. You make sure he eats, you hold him when he's scared, you play with him and that damn dog, and you put down the rules he has to follow."

Hadley shrugged.

Jamila used to do those things for Drew, but she wasn't here anymore, so Hadley had taken it upon herself to fill in for her because that's what Jamila would have wanted. Once they reached The Caves, however, Hadley would hand the boy over to someone else who would take up the responsibility of caring for him.

Every mother in the Compound was only ever a mother to one child. It made sense as that was the only way one could give a child their full attention. Hadley would be too busy being a mother to her daughter to be able to spare any time for Drew. He didn't deserve that. She would choose his new guardian carefully.

Gram Lee took a gulp of mead before refilling her cup from a flask she fished out of her pocket.

"I've also seen how he looks at you and how he cares about everything you say or do. You're as much a mother to that child as anyone ever will be, Hadley," Gram Lee said. "Don't take that for granted. Trust me. When you misuse the opportunity to be a mother to a child who needs one, it ends up hurting a lot more than any pain you've ever known."