part one
Stella's POV*
I walk into math class and see that we have new seats. Great just what I needed on a Monday morning. However I cheer up a bit to see me seated by my crush, Naomi. She is known for being the half closeted gay at school. Our school is very homophobic so she doesn't say she is gay but everyone knows she is. Sitting down I see her eyes light up when her name is by mine. Maybe she likes me- what no! She is into different girls not some shy girl. Gosh i hate feelings so much!
"Hey Steller." I love when she calls me that, my favorite nickname.
"What's up Naomi." I say.
"Did you hear about the tests we have coming up? We have so many!"
"I know! Like we have lives to live people!" We casually chatted about until the math teacher started class. During the class, i couldn't help but notice how we were playing footsies the whole time. She definitely doesn't like me, it's just her moving her feet around. By the time class was over, we had our next class together too, science. I know we had a test today but I totally forgot about it.
"I'm so going to fail." I complain to Naomi.
"I'm not, I get an extra day to study." She was smirking at me. Gosh that smirk.
"Lucky! I wish I could." She went up to talk to our teacher and got the extra day to study because she was sick and I got handed my test. Luckily for me though, we use morse code sometimes so when I tapped she gave me the answers. Soon after I turned in my test and got ready to leave for the day. Naomi always drives me home after school so we can study together. Yeah, we are basically nerds but who cares. Not me, it means I get to see her dogs. After the bell rang, Naomi grabbed my hand basically dragging me through the halls.
"Why are you dragging me?" I was genuinely curious.
"Because I got a new pet at home." She looked so happy so i started to run with her.
~~~~~ time skip y'all ~~~~~
When we got to her house, she ran upstairs and i followed to see a huge tank with no water in it.
"What is in there?" She didn't answer, she just opened it up and pulled out a snake. A MOTHER FUCKING SNAKE!
"Meet Jeremy!" She was happy so I hid my fear. She could sense it I guess though cause she put him back soon after.
"I got him over the weekend, he doesn't bite though, he's a python." I was somewhat relieved to know that.
"We have so much homework to do!" I was complaining again.
"Yeah, how about we watch a movie while we work?" She asks and I obviously say yes. She turns on a movie called 50 shades of gray. Classic.
"I love this movie!" S he exclaims I respond with,"me too!"
I know I didn't love it but she did so I do too now. Halfway through the movie, I wasn't even doing my work, just staring at her.
Her eyes were so beautiful and her hair was so gorgeous. I slowly put my head on her lap and she looks down from her work.
"What are you doing Stellar?" She asks questioning my actions.
"Nothing, just not math." I laugh she starts laughing too and then tickles me in my side. We were both on the floor now laughing our asses off and accidentally turn off the tv. I finally get on top of her and we stop laughing realizing our closeness.
"You know Steller, there is something I've never told you."
"Yeah what is it?"
"I think i like someone but I can't tell my feelings. It's weird like I like this girl but I can't tell if it's friendship or lovers."
"Oh, who is said person?" I ask hoping she says me.
"Your mom." The most basic masc joke.
"No seriously, what does she look like?"
"Well, she has beautiful hair and eyes, she is so sweet and always helps me no matter what, she looks like an angel in my eyes. She always wants to be near me and she always makes me laugh. I guess that isn't looks but it's why I like her."
I don't know what came over me but I kissed her. I kissed naomi.
Naomi's POV*
She kissed me, my crush kissed me. I don't know what told me to do this but I pulled her closer and deepened our kiss. We were so close all I could think about was why is she kissing me. I'm not pretty enough, I mean none of my exes actually liked me. All of my exes acted gay but I was just their practice runs I guess. Basic bitches. I break away from the kiss, I didn't want to but I had to ask.
"Are you sure? I haven't dated in so long and I don't want to ruin our friendship. I mean I really like you Stella but we have a good bond and if it's ruined cause of me-" she shushes me with her finger.
"I'm sure, Naomi. I know what your exes did to you but they were stupid and I love you so much as a friend and as a person. You are the most gorgeous person I 've ever laid eyes on. please don't feel like you're ruining this."
I just kiss her and pull her close to me. I lead her to my bed and we are on our sides making out when all of a sudden I feel her snake her hand around my waist. I went through something when I was younger and that motion brought me back to it. I just got up and left to the bathroom. I could hear her calling my name and I felt so bad but I was freaking out. I couldn't deal with this again. I go searching through my drawer looking for something, soon I found it.
TW: SELF INJURY - if this triggers you go to the next part, might be slight mention but no smut this chapter. sorry - TW
I take the blade out of its packaging and see my old scars. I felt the need to make more all of a sudden. So I did, I made so many more. I felt sick to my stomach with pain and stress. I kept telling myself one more and I 'll stop but I couldn't. I just couldn't. I wanted the pain mentally to stop. I hear a banging at my door and I forgot that Stella was here.
"Sorry, i just had a flashback, can I come out in like 5 minutes?" I ask.
"May I come in? I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you, just let me talk, Naomi." She sounded gentle and genuine with guilt. I grab a towel and hide my blade and cuts.
"Come in, the doors unlocked." I say letting her know the door can be opened.
"Why are you covering yourself?" she asked me.
"Im sorry, I couldn't stop." I say with so much guilt. She doesn't talk but instead holds me singing a soft melody until I fall asleep in her arms.
A/N~ i'm sorry abt the end with the cutting and stuff but let me know how you feel abt angst. the smut will be in next part trust me, it will be nice.
