ch. 23 • the devil is a capricorn

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AN: translations in the comments for this line.

January 20th. Finally time.

Time for the pressure bandage to be gone, for the meeting with our lawyer. And...

Time to give Laurie her birthday presents!

The past few weeks had consisted of me gnawing holes into my cheeks and tongue to refrain from spoiling her gifts. Thankfully— and stressfully— Fashion Week was rapidly approaching and fully encroached our waking lives the past 9 or so days. Meetings, investments, supply runs— late nights digging to the bottom of a takeout box and straining eyes against the blue-light of a computer screen.

One of the gifts was self-centered in a way— but the joy it would create in my girlfriend was the main focus.

"Laurie, honey, it's time to go," I cooed, shaking the woman by her hip. "Come on, birthday woman. Time to face 39 with a smile."

"Smile, my ass," groaned the raven-haired woman, stretching wide in the bed. "Je ne veux pas."

"Fine," I sighed. "I was going to give you one of your presents early..."

Her head perked up and she opened one eye, half-lidded. "And that is? Hopefully you, my delicious love."

I froze, heartbeat racing. After the momentary mind glitch, I glared at the blanketed woman. "Get up, let's go."

"Happily," Laurie yawned, slipping out of bed. "But where is my gift?"

"You lost the right to an early present," I grumbled. "You dirty-minded fox."

"Ah, it is not my fault that I want you to be my birthday breakfast," she lamented with a huff. "...And lunch. And dinner."

"Laurie!"

"...Definitely dessert."

"God damn it," I moaned, attempting to steel my resolve. "Let's get these appointments over with and we'll see what the day holds, okay?" I pecked her lips several times and tickled her side.

"Okay, okay. I surrender— for now."

I stalked down the street towards Laurie's flat, muttering under my breath. Behind me jogged my asshole of a girlfriend, calling out my name and apologizing profusely. The bright light of the sun reflecting off of the countless glass windows hurt my brain.  It was an adjustment, for sure, having both of my eyes back and functional

Functional. Only when behind thick corrective lenses to help train my eye into submission, or else I would be looking in two separate directions. 

"My beautiful darling," Laurie cried. "I meant it as you look cute, not like you are a monkey!"

Compliment gone 'wrong'. Apparently, I was 'as cute as a chimpanzee'. 

Giggling quietly, I continued my 'pouting' walk until I reached Laurie's apartment building. I waited at the door, averting my eyes from here at every chance, until she scanned us in. The elevator trip to her flat was silent, tense, and it honestly began to bug my conscience— messing with her this bad on her birthday.

Right as I was about to relent and apologize, Laurie pinned me against the wall of the elevator and whispered in my ear:

"Little darling," she breathed. "Must I fuck the attitude out of you?"

My legs almost gave out then and there. "Like you could," I chirped back, smirking up at the security camera. "Look who's out of luck..."

She scowled and huffed.

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