Catch Me If I Fall (PJO/Avengers Crossover)

64

Percy woke to a splitting headache, and he shifted uncomfortably. He was about to run a hand through his hair, but then realised gold chains bound his arms and legs down. He groaned, and, upon realising that Loki was behind him, tied to him, he elbowed Loki in the back. At this, he groaned, too.

"Loki? Are you awake?" Percy asked, elbowing him again.

"Yes, I'm awake... ugh, my head," he groaned, shifting uncomfortably. "Where are we?"

"Don't know," Percy said, sighing when he realised the handle of one of Loki's daggers was digging uncomfortably into the side of his waist.

They took a few moments to gather their wits, and, finally, when they were sorted out enough to start trying to get out of the chains, the door a few feet away opened to reveal Scrapper 142, Thor and Bruce Banner.

"Surprise," Loki said, his voice monotone.

Thor grabbed a can and threw it at Loki. It ended up hitting in between his and Percy's head.

"Ow," they both said in unison.

"Just had to be sure," Thor apologised, walking into the room with S142 and Bruce, who eyed Loki warily.

"Hello, Bruce," he said.

"So, last time I saw you, you were trying to kill everybody. What are you at these days?" Bruce asked.

"It varies from moment to moment."

Bruce's face was priceless.

"Percy," Bruce nodded at him, getting ready to walk away to the safety of S142 and Thor.

"Good to see you, Bruce. I thought you were dead," he smiled. He then proceeded to shift again, groaning. 

"Many thought the same." 

"Is that a dragonfang?" Thor asked in astonishment, pointing to some kind of sword on a table.

"It is," 142 nodded, walking up to her counter, grabbing a few bits and pieces from it whilst Bruce had some food.

"The famed sword of the Valkyrie..." Thor picked it up to admire it.

"Valkyrie..." Percy muttered, finally making the connection. "Those are the warriors you told me about, right, Loki? The ones who help heroes find their way to Valhalla?"

"You're learning!" Loki gasped sarcastically. 

"Oh, shut up," Percy rolled his eyes.

"Why don't you make me?"

Percy elbowed him again, rolling his eyes at Loki's overdramatic exclamation of mock-pain. 

"Sakaar and Asgard are about as far apart as any two known systems," 142 said. "Our best bet is a wormhole just outside city limits. Refuel on Xandar and we can be back on Asgard in, er... 18 months?"

"Nope," Thor shook his head and pointed out the window and the biggest wormhole in the sky. "We're going through that one."

"The Devil's Anus?" 142 questioned.

From across the room, mouth still full, Bruce looked up and began to walk to the window. "Anus? Wait, who's anus!?"

"For the record, I didn't know it was called that when I picked it," Thor reasoned.

"That looks like a collapsing neutron star inside of an Einstein Rosen Bridge!!" Bruce exclaimed.

"We need another ship, that will tear mine to pieces," 142 said.

"She's right," Thor nodded. "We need one that can withstand the geodetic strain from the singularity..."

"And has an offline power steering system that could also function without the onboard computer!" Bruce nodded, agreeing.