Suffocating

Biology

Sophie.

Calvin and I sat in the living room at the coffee table. His biology book sat between us and dozens of loose leaf papers covered the table. Calvin was chewing on the cap of his pen, his eyebrows furrowed.

"Can you find it?" I asked, watching him struggle to name the plant and animal cells accordingly.

He sighed. "No. It doesn't even sound like it should be real."

I smiled and pointed at the base of the nucleus. "Right there. The endoplasmic reticulum."

"It sounds like it should be on the body rather than in it."

"Funny." I put another diagram in front of him and took the other one from him. "Start again."

He groaned.

"I know it's boring but you need to pass. I'm not letting you fail."

He looked up at me for a few seconds before he went back to working on the diagram. He filled in the black spaces then handed it over to me. "There."

I compared it to my master copy then handed him a blank one. "Good. Keep going."

"Sophie-"

"You're never going to learn it if you don't do it over and over again. Did you ever wonder why teachers give homework?"

"To punish us?"

"No. Homework is repetition that helps you learn the material. The more you do it, the better you'll be at it."

"I don't think that's how it works with me."

"You wouldn't be getting these right if it wasn't working."

He passed over another finished paper to me. "Can we please more on to something else? Something that's not a diagram?"

I handed over a quiz I'd written up then started making flash cards.

He groaned. "Are you trying to kill me?"

I bit my lip to stop my smile. His words made me feel sad for him, that he couldn't say that without it meaning something entirely different. I wanted him to be and feel normal.

He finished the quiz about ten minutes later than slid it over to me. "I need a break. This is killing me."

"Cal-"

"Just half an hour of TV then we can get back to studying."

I had to agree with him, the studying was boring me, too. What would half an hour do anyway? He was doing fine and learning faster than I expected. I had nothing to worry about.

I went to the couch and handed him the controller. "You can pick something."

He sat down beside me and flipped through the channels before finding a movie. It was an action movie involving some superhero.

"That's Superman. This remake isn't as good as the original but it's not the worst."

"I've never seen any of them before."

He raised his eyebrows. "None? Ever?"

I shook my head.

"Well I'll have to change that then."

"I'm looking forward to it."

We spent more than half an hour on the couch, watching the movie. Calvin gave me a run down on what happened before where we started and a background of Superman himself. He was so animated when he spoke and it made me wonder why he would ever kill himself if he got so excited over something as simple as Superman. I didn't know every detail of why he did what he did. I didn't know what made him do it. But I still couldn't understand why.

The front door shut and I jumped. My head was on Calvin's shoulder and the movie was long over. There was a blanket covering both of us.

I looked over the back of the couch toward the door and saw my mom and sister walking inside, holding plastic bags in their hands.

Lexie rolled her eyes at me and stomped up to her room. Mom raised her eyes.

"You must be Calvin."

He turned around and smiled. "It's nice to meet you. Sophie's told me a lot about you."

"Hopefully something good."

He nodded. "Of course."

"I was helping him study for his biology class." I said, my cheeks red.

Mom nodded at the steps. "Sophie, can I talk to you in my room? We'll only be a few minutes."

I nodded and left before she could embarrass me, or Calvin, any further.

"You invited Calvin over?" She asked, setting the bags on her bed.

"I offered to help him study for a test he has."

"On the couch?"

I sighed. "We were taking a break."

"I don't mind if you make any friends or a boyfriend but I want you to focus on school, too. I don't want him to distract you."

"Relax, mom. We're just friends."

She nodded. "Just be careful, Sophie."

"I know how to handle myself."

"Do you want to invite him to stay for dinner?"

I raised my eyebrows. "Are you sure?"

"I'd like to get to know him."

I wasn't sure how mom or dad or Lexie would feel about Calvin when they find out he tried killing himself. I wasn't judging him but that didn't mean my family was as nice. I didn't want to put Calvin through that if I didn't have to.

"I'll ask him." I walked down the steps and helped him put his papers into his folder.

"Thanks for helping me study. I really appreciate it."

"My mom wanted to know if you wanted to stay for dinner."

He paused. "Do you want me to stay?"

"I... I don't want my parents to embarrass you or ask you any personal questions."

He smiled. "I like you're concern but don't worry about me. I'm used to it by now."

"Let me give you a tour of the house."