It's time to move on

Chapter 10 - I don't deserve her

--JASON--

Being with Anna is so easy. The way she apologized without any ego or pride made me like her more. 

I don't know why it felt so bad hearing that I am no one to make her decisions because what she said was true. 

In spite of knowing that she was staring at me, I ignored her as I was pissed off by her comment. If it's not for Gabe who told me to wait as he's got work to do at library, I would have left school by now. 

I am glad I waited, though I am still confused what he wants to do at library at this hour.

We walked down the grounds together after her bone-breaking hug. I am not complaining since she hugs me like a teddy bear that she doesn't want to lose which is kind of err---sweet. 

It surprised me how the innocent and shy Anna Haven who didn't talk to me on our first meeting said all that to me in addition to apologizing.

If she can do that to save our friendship, then I should protect her at any cost.

But is that what we are? Just friends?

I can't deny the urge I felt to kiss her after history class when we were so close to each other. It would have almost happened if she hadn't stepped back.

But, what does she want from me?

I know she finds me hot. But is that reason simple enough to like someone? 

Gabe told me last week that Anna looks at me, in an affectionate way during our common lunches. He said that there is a high possibility that she likes me too, though I never accepted his accusations of liking her.

If what he said is true, then what am I supposed to do? Ask her out? 

But what if he's wrong?  

Am I being paranoid? May be.

Ugh. So many unanswered questions.

There is a high chance that he isn't true since Anna is not interested in dating. Moreover, she is too good for me. I don't deserve her. 

What about Cheryl and the deal we had?

I am stuck in my inner turmoil until I felt a tap on my shoulder only to see Anna frowning at me.

"You spaced out. I didn't realize that you aren't listening" she stated.

"I am sorry. What were you saying?"

"I am sorry for all that happened today--"

I interjected with a smile "You apologized a million times already. Stop saying it because I should be the one to say sorry for snapping at you. I am so---"

"That's OK. You were angry" She said shrugging casually.

"Then the same goes for you too. Now that we forgave each other, I think this is the first time I saw you angry" I replied, putting both of my hands in my side pockets.

"May be the last if you behave properly" she smirked.

"When was the last time you were angry?" I asked, genuinely interested to know about her.

The smirk on her face wiped off and she cleared her throat before replying "Long back. Like years"

To say I am shocked would be an understatement because this is the first time I heard someone say they weren't angry for years.

"Why? Not that it's a bad thing but why weren't you?"

She took time to reply "I didn't have anyone to be angry at. I was hurt most of the times but not angry"