Living With The Taylor's [COMPLETED]

Chapter Twenty: "Cannibal!"

*trigger warning*

Chapter Twenty: "Cannibal!"

When someone tells you a big secret, it can either be shocking or you kind of just knew deep down.

When Max told me his best friend killed himself, it was shocking.

"What?" I ask, confused. I look down at my wrists. The thought of killing myself didn't even come through my mind. I just need some relief. I need something to move the pain to another spot instead of my heart.

"Peyton, I wasn't always a nice guy. I was a bully, I didn't care about anyone other than myself. I was the bad boy of the school. Now, Dylan, he was the best friend anyone would ask for. He'd do anything for me and everyone else. He cared about everyone and was the kindest kid ever. Because all I focused on was myself, I didn't know he was getting bullied. It was bad. Kids would push him and steal his money. He would get physically and verbally abused. Stupid me had no idea. And there was no way he would've told me because he wouldn't want me to worry. About two years ago, he started to become distant. I didn't really notice, because then all I focused on was me. I never smoked or did drugs. Of course, I had sex and drank, but that's really it."

He stands up, and I give him a questioning look. He pulls me up by my hands and sits me on the toilet. He pulls over a little stool and sits down.

"About a year and a half ago, I got the call that he killed himself. I was a mess. I blamed it on me. If only I was just a little more selfless instead of selfish, then maybe he would still be here with me. Maybe-"

"Hey, don't say that," I interrupt, "Don't blame yourself. You couldn't have done anything."

"But it is my fault. I didn't notice he was getting bullied. I didn't even notice he was becoming distant. He was my best friend for god's sake!"

He stops talking for a minute.

"That's when I decided to change my ways. I stopped drinking and having sex. I decided to become more like Dylan. I didn't want to be the bad boy anymore. I wanted to be the best friend for someone else like Dylan was for me. It's just that most people are afraid of me because of who I used to be."

Max finishes talking and looks me in the eyes.

"I'm so sorry," My eyes tear up a little.

"Hey, it's not your fault. It's mine," He cups my face in his hands.

"It's not your fault either. If the thought was in his mind, you couldn't get it out of him. Plus I didn't mean to scare you like that."

He releases my face and looks down. He nods.

"Why were you in my room anyway?"

He looks back up at me and frowns, "I came to check on you. I heard you scream. Are you okay?"

I take a deep breath, deciding what to say to him.

"So a few years ago I was taking out the trash. I was just living with my mom at the time because my parents got a divorce when I was ten. So I threw the trash bag into the trashcan, and I hear a gunshot. I got shot in my leg by my father. He killed himself a day later, so we never got to know the reason. My mom immediately came outside and took me to the hospital. I ended up healing and I was fine physically, not mentally."

I take a deep breath.

"So after I was almost healed, my mom asked me to go grocery shopping for her. I ended up going to the store, and that's when I got my first panic attack. It was scary. I didn't really know what was going on. Ever since I got shot in my leg and had my panic attack, I couldn't go places alone. I suffered from many panic attacks and nightmares. I still can't go places alone. Eventually, they both went away, but after what has happened with my mom, they came back. I've been having nightmares, and I had another panic attack just now."