We've Met Before

6 - Fifteen Minutes to Spare

KAIA

I clammer inside Jennifer's Jeep Wrangler, finding the passenger's seat, and sinking into the chair.
My eyes feel heavy, and the last thing I want to do is enter that wretched school. It's dingy, and dry, but also surprisingly moist. It's all the bad feelings you can possibly think of, except worse.
    Jennifer hasn't shut up about her birthday party since I've been inside the car, which has been ten minutes, I think.
    I look at the backseats and see Jane making mocking faces towards Jennifer and I laugh. Jennifer stops and looks towards me, eyeing me down.
    "What are you laughing at?" She asks suspiciously.
    "Laugh? What laugh?" I ask, biting my tongue to suppress my giggle.
    "All of you are so annoying. I swear I'll uninvite all of you!" She shouts, looking at the rear view mirror to stress her points towards Gabby and Jane.
    Jane rolls her eyes, "You're actually an idiot. It's my birthday too dumbass, you can't just uninvite me."
    "Can to! I'll call for a separate party instead of a joint one," she says in a matter-of-fact way.
    "I haven't even said anything so why am I getting uninvited?" She pouts, fixing her lip gloss.
——
    Elliot and I meet in front of the library after first period, as usual.
    I like the routine I have going at school. I think it keeps me looking forward to something.
    "You know, I've been meaning to ask you something," Elliot pauses, scratching the back of his head, "I was thinking we could—"
    Before he can finish, he's interrupted by a hand over his shoulder.
    "Get lost," Cade narrows his eyes at him, shoving Elliot away from us.
What's his fucking problem?
    "Fuck off, you can't just do that," I scrutinize, walking towards a confused Elliot, and pulling his sweater towards me.
    Cade's eyes blaze, burn, on me. His gaze is a mix of confusion, anger, and bewilderment, and in the mix, I think I even see a sliver of hurt.
    I stare at him in frustration, wondering what's taken over him, and then I hear a shout.
    "Cade, what's up dog?" Dean Howard leaps on his shoulders, excitedly smiling like a lost puppy.
    Dean Howard and I have only spoken twice. He's probably the nicer of his friends, the only one who ever acknowledged me in a way that wasn't 'Yo Steele, why do you keep hanging out with that loser.'
    I drag Elliot away from a distracted Cade, huffing.
    "Was that Cade Steele?" He whispers.
    "What does it matter?" I retort.
    "I didn't know you knew him."
——
    "I'm not hungry," I groan.
    Jane holds out a half of her sandwich out to me. A sandwich I've rejected six times already.
     "You have to be hungry. Kaia, you never eat anything for lunch, c'mon. Take at least a quarter!" She breaks a half, from her half, and shoves it towards me.
I take it begrudgingly and begin to eat.
"Jane, stop forcing Kaia to eat if she doesn't want to." Jennifer says, taking a forkful of her salad and shoving it in her mouth.
"Shut the fuck up, and eat your salad," Jane sneers. She sends Jennifer a glaring look, and Jennifer remains silent.
"It's okay Jane, my appetite just isn't that big during this time of day."
I'm not lying. For a really long time I thought I maybe had an eating disorder, or that I was subconsciously struggling with one, but I'm not. I'm not scared of food, or scared of it's consequences. I guess I just feel better empty.
I usually don't eat anything until I get home. I make dinner for myself, and I'll usually leave some on the stove if my mom comes home that night.
Elliot enters the table, late as usual, and he's his usual playful self. He talks on and on about his last class and we all smile and laugh at his small anecdotes.
"J, is the party tonight?" Elliot peeks over to Jane, and Jennifer.
"Yes, Friday at 5!" Jennifer exclaims, seeming much more enthused than her sister, "Our parents are out of town which means the house is all to ourselves."
"Who all is going?" I ask, taking the last bite of Jane's sandwich.
Jennifer bites her lip, looking anxiously at Jane.
"You want me to tell them?" Jane asks, rolling her eyes at a nodding Jennifer. Jane exhales and props her elbows on the table, "Jennifer thought it would be a good idea to pass an invitation out to every single lunch period, so she doesn't even know who's coming."
"Maybe it won't be that bad—"
"Holy shit that was a bad idea," Gabby laughs, placing a hand over her mouth.
I look towards Jennifer and she seems like she's about to burst into tears. Jane catches an eye of this and places an arm over her shoulders, an act of begrudging camaraderie.
I've always wanted a sibling. Before I realized what 'divorce' meant, I remember begging my mom for a sibling. I used to wake up crying at three in the morning, complaining about how alone I felt sleeping in my bed alone.
This was during boyfriend number two, so I'd always compare it to the fact that she had someone, while I didn't.
I'd usually get some scream as a response, which would in turn make me cry even more.
I think I've always selfishly liked the idea of someone having to like me just because it was in their nature. They were born to like me, and to give me shoulder pats when I looked like I was about to cry.
    "What are y'all going to tell your parents?" Elliot asks.
    "We'll handle that when they get back next weekend from their trip. I'm sure they'll patch it over with Mrs. Martha and pay her overtime or something," Jane pauses for a second, "I don't think they'll be mad or anything."
    Jane and Jennifer's parents work overseas often, and tend to not be home more than the latter. It used to really affect Jane, especially because there's nothing in this world she loves more than her family, but eventually she stopped crying about it all. She accepted it for what it was.
Jennifer seems to have calmed down, and conversation is light and airy again.
I wonder if they're ever mad I don't talk more. I always something to say, I just think that voicing it out is much harder.
——
Pre-party jitters is something I've never had to suffer from. I actually hate parties, and being around a lot of people. I usually make exceptions for my friends, but with all unintended harm, even that gets a bit tiring.
My phone dings beside me on the carpet.
Holy shit your friends house is big - Dahlia
I pick up the phone and text back.
You're here?! let me go get you!
    I glance at my busy friends, and decide to slip through the door.
    The twin's house is huge. A benefit of having uberwealthy parents is that you live in a 5 room house, with 6 bathrooms, and all the amenities of a small shopping center.
    I tip-toe down the halls, finally making it to the staircase. There's already loads of people downstairs. Dozens of people congregate through all the nooks and crannies of the large house. Most are probably here just for the free booze, and an opportunity to talk to people they would've otherwise never even met.
    "Kaia!" I hear a shout from across the room. Dahlia is on her feet, scurrying towards me, shoving past people with short apologies and excuse-mes.
    She finally reaches me at the edge of the stairs and tackles me in a bear hug. It takes me aback and I laugh in her messy brown hair. We separate and she's gleaming from head to toe. She's dressed in a casual black dress, wearing the same pair of white converse she always sports.
She's tanner than usual. March does her good.
"It feels like an eternity since I've seen you Kai!" She squeals, placing my face between both her hands.
I hate being touched, but I make an exception for Dahlia.
I don't see Dahlia as often as I did my freshman, or sophomore year. She moved away to some private school closer towards the city, and away from the peaceful suburbs.
She's the city now. Her eyes shine like skyscrapers, and her lips are tainted with the rowdy noise of city traffic.
She looks alive.
"Did the invites get that far? Dahlia you live like thirty minutes away from us now." I say flabbergasted as to how she had made it here.
"Word gets around," she turns around, motioning towards a tall brunette in the crowd, "Kaia, this is my boyfriend Jake."
She smiles shyly at him, a shyness I had never seen expressed in Dahlia.
Dahlia was notorious for being outspoken, in everything. She had a thirty minute debate with a kid in her English her sophomore year about feminism and the kid ran out crying at some point.
Yet, here she was. Silent, shy, bashful. Not in a bad way. She seemed satiated and at peace. Maybe it wasn't the city that made her seem more vibrant.
Jake extends his hand, and dabs me up.
I widen my eyes at Kaia and she scowls at Jake.
"I told you to stop dabbing all my friends up Jacob. No girl is going to willingly dab you up."
Ahh, there she is.
"Lia, I told you that I feel uncomfortable doing anything but dabbing your friends up," he pouts, his blue eyes softening at Dahlia's amused anger.
She rolls her eyes and plants a kiss at his cheek, smiling suddenly like an idiot, "It's okay," she turns to face me, "Let's catch up for a bit," she looks to Jake, and he gives her a reassuring nod. I sense a bit of hesitation in Dahlia, but she lets go of his hand and he walks away towards a group of boys he seems familiar with.
"He's so cute," she whispers in my ear, earning a giggle from me, "How have you been?"
"You know, the usual. Where's Kaitlyn?" I ask, looking around.
    "'The usual,' what does that mean?" She looks down at me suspiciously, "I think she has a family dinner or something."
I ignore her first question, "It's always something like that isn't it? It's enough that I barely see her at school because of our schedules."
Kaitlyn Nguyen's parents are always having her do extra curricular activities. She lives plastered on college applications and gpa transcripts. Her parents are also very religious, which is why she spends her Saturday's at bible school.
Kaitlyn isn't religious at all though. I think her parent's habits have strung her away from all of it.
Kaitlyn and Dahlia are actually very alike, except Dahlia obsesses over school out of her own conviction.
I used to worry that they'd cast me aside. Friendships of three never work right? But that worry disseminated over the years. I became comfortable with them, and I love them like the siblings I never had. We've been separated so many times yet we always come back.
"I wonder what Jake is doing right now," her words are filled with angst as she looks around for her long forgotten lover.
I think the worst. "What? Can you not trust in him?"
I can't help but automatically assume he's an asshole who doesn't deserve my amazing, beautiful, intelligent friend.
"What?" She asks wide eyed, "No! It's just that Jake has social anxiety. I told him it was okay if we didn't come tonight, but we' ve been working on a couple of exercises his therapist recommended, and he said he felt confident to try something new today." Her voice becomes wistful. "I just didn't expect there to be this many people, and I don't think he did either. Kaia, the place just seems to be getting more and more packed."
My heart wrenches at the desperation in her voice, and her anxious lookout for Jake.
"Dahlia, go." I say with a smile, faking an understanding for the position she's in.
I've never had a boyfriend, so I have no idea what she's feeling right now. Good thing that sympathy is free.
I look around and realize how truly full the downstairs foyer is. A place that once seemed so anxiously big, is now claustrophobic-ly small. The heat from everyone's body palpitates against mine. I can barely recognize anybody.
I'm now realizing how bad of an idea this truly is.