Sounds of the Prairie

Chapter 3 Essie

Chapter 3 Essie

One more day. That was the amount of time I had left before traveling to God knows where. One day to visit my families graves and say goodbye while promising justice. One more day to spend with Richard and Rebecca not knowing if I will see them again. One last day to be settled and prepared in the core of my being and pray for forgiveness for what I am going to do. I told myself God will understand my decisions but from what I knew of the bible, murder was still murder. Yet I would not feel safe in the world until their existence was wiped clean from it. The wound to my upper abdomen was healing well but even still I wrapped it in the new cloth and tied it until I knew it was sure to hold up, then slipped on the house robe Rebecca had kindly loaned me until I had a dress to wear which, will hopefully arrive today. Rebecca had told me not to be concerned with getting anything together for our trip because her and her husband had done it for me. She was to afraid that I will exert myself. In truth, I was fine with them getting all of my things gathered up because I really didn't even know where to start. With them doing it I was more then confident that I will have everything I will ever need. My mind thought about them both. Rebecca was handling me leaving so well and being ever so helpful. Sometimes I would catch her giving me a solemn look but when she became aware that I could see her, the look would quickly morph to a smile and she would return to whatever she was doing. Richard was a different story. He hardly spoke to me and if I asked him a question, it was followed with a brisk answer and I would be lying if I said it didn't bother me. Right now, they felt like my anchor to this world and all I had. I didn't even want to think about not having them to rely on. When I left my room to go to the front of the house, there was no one to be seen but I could hear grunting and scuffling from outside, pushing open the screen door and beneath the shade of the covered porch, I came to see Richard bending over inspecting Millie's hooves.

"Millie!" I screamed my excitement as I did my best not to run to her. Her tall ears perked up at the sound of my voice and she whinnied to me. Her coat was freshly washed and sparkling a beautiful auburn to match her braided mane and newly shunned hooves. You would never know looking at her what we survived, how she had saved my life. I scratched her cheeks while she playfully nipped in my direction.

"She is a fine horse that one."

I looked at Richard surprised he had spoken to me as he set down her front leg and gently brushed a hand along her front shoulder.

"She is one of the best horses." I replied moving to lavish her with all my affection. Watching him with her you could tell he knew his way around horses and already seemed so familiar with my Millie. He was so kind and that only made the guilt in my stomach flair like I ate something sour. In a voice even I could barely hear I said, "I am sorry." His large hand quit pushing the brush and his eyes vacantly looked forward before he gave a chuckle and a shake of his head, "You are a bigger person then I am Essie. I should be the one apologizing but I will admit, I have pride. I have been rude to you, but I'll admit I'm worried. I only want you to be safe. How can I do that with you God knows how far away?" His honesty took me by surprise if only a little bit. He reached over and held my hand, "I'm sorry Esther," He said while giving me a squeeze and lowering his voice, "We always wanted to have children. Hoped we would have a big family, children running around a dinner table at night, house full of laughter. For some reason God didn't see the need to grant us our wishes. We finally resigned ourselves to just each other and for a long time that was happiness. Then I watch my Rebecca with you," He paused to clear his throat and his eyes red rimmed with unshed tears, "She should have been in the family way. She would have been an amazing Mama. I think the two of you have more in common then you know and for that she cares deeply for you. When you leave we will both be mighty heartbroken, but we will pray for your return with everything we have."