Sounds of the Prairie

Chapter 7 Essie

Joe and I did our best to catch up to Tucker and Colorado but after a bit we decided to just hold up in the back and figured they would slow down at some point. At first Joe was silent like he always was, more of the observe and learn wisdom type of man, till he broke the silence. 

"I have never seen him blow a fuse like that, ever. You've got to be something else."

"What do you mean by that?"

He chuckled and shook his head in disbelief, as if somehow it explained itself.

"Miss Essie, Colorado hasn't ever acted like that, never ever have I seen him that frustrated, that is for sure. That's got me thinking you get under his skin."

My eyes scrunched together and I leaned away from him, "I'm not trying to."

Again, he just shook his head. I was dafter then I realized to people's emotions. Looking forward my eyes found Colorado's form. He had rolled up the sleeves of his button up exposing his well-tanned forearms that flexed when he worked the reigns of his horse and when he faced the dropping sun, sweat glistened beneath the brim of his cowboy hat while illuminating the freckles dusting his cheeks and shirt sticking to his broad shoulders, Colorado was a remarkable sight. I could not understand why he would be affected by me. In that moment he must have realized I was staring at him because our eyes connected and I could swear his face morphed from three different expressions. At first he smiled like he was happy to see me, then to a stern one, and finally to one that you could discern to be understanding. Which was something I would expect, he was always so understanding. It seemed that is what everyone said the most about him. His chest visibly rose and fell from a sigh as I could feel myself do the same. I felt a pull to go to him, make him smile or let him know I am going to be fine, even if it was a lie, the likelihood of none of us walking away from this too high. I put all my hope in praying. Colorado kept giving me more and more reason to see what could become out of the rest of my life. Joe and Tucker did as well, they felt to me the same as my own brother had, funny in the moments you needed it but reliable when it mattered. 

"Joe, you said you have sisters?" 

"Yes, two younger ones. They are spitfires, those two. Came out of the womb being a handful and it hasn't stopped. I told you I would teach you to shoot just like I taught them and I am sure you will be just as natural at it," Looking at the side of his face I could see the smile as he spoke of them. They may have been handfuls but you could tell from the smile that he adored his sisters but within the span of a blink his face changed as he turned his head towards me, "I couldn't imagine losing one of them. I'm sorry about your little brother. Were you two close?" 

I stared at the horn upon my saddle and fought the tears that were welling in the bottoms of my eyes. Nicholas had drove me crazy, just as Joe's sisters probably did him, as I think most siblings did. You grow up spending every day together with different personalities and different likes. There were moments where you wanted to strangle them while they were talking just to get some peace. Where Nicholas was high strung, thinking with the attention span of a squirrel and did his best to live in his imagination, I tried to learn everything and be in the present. Calm and dedicated, as my father would say. Thinking about it now, my brother's differences from me were what made me love him so much. I would watch him in one of his daydreams, out in the front pasture, imagination running wild as he pretended to be everything from a member of The James Gang to Wild Bill Hickok. He would even turn his fingers into guns as he did his best to shoot at anything that moved and made the noises of the gun going off from his lips. I admired  the amount of joy he found from his childhood but now all I can think of are the opportunities and great things he would have done as a man. All of those dreams blown away like a puff of cigar smoke in the night, fading up, up and disappearing. I came back out of my thoughts and nodded to Joe yes. If  I were to speak I feared I would start shedding tears that wouldn't stop, my throat already feeling tight and face hot. I decided to ride up to where Colorado was sitting and staring out across the waving landscape.