High School Fur - A gay furry coming of age story

Chapter 23

I could not hecking wait to go to school today, I had been staring at the ceiling waiting for my alarm to go off since 6am.

Jackson had offered me a lift into school and I said yes within a heartbeat, lunch was too far away and getting to see him in the morning had my stomach all in knots again.

If I could teleport him here right now I would, instead I watched the clock tick slowly while eating my breakfast

8am soon came around and I heard Jacksons car pull up outside, I ran out the door immediately shouting bye to mom, dad and my sister, pulling myself into the passenger seat Jackson grinned "hey" his paw touched my leg and he kissed me

"I've been thinking about that all night" he said putting the car into drive and pulling off, "me too" I admit, "was your dad ok?"

"not really, but I don't care" he shrugs his shoulders, "I can't wait to stay over with you again"

"we have our away match this weekend" I blush at the thought of Jackson and I being alone again, especially somewhere perhaps we didn't have to be as quiet as we were at my house, i'd never gone much further myself with another guy, but i was already thinking about it with Jackson.

Jackson pulled up into the car park and looked around, there were students all around us "I should have kissed you once more before we got here" he said taking his seat belt off

"oh... yeah" I agree with him realising what he meant.

"I really like you, but I'm not ready for everyone to know" his paw rests on my leg again briefly before he snatches it away

"yeah, I get it, you need time its ok" I say but inside I'm screaming, I want to tell the world about Jackson, and tell all my friends why I'm so happy, but I cant, I know I cant.

"we're like dating though right?" I asked trying to clarify what exactly we were.

"yes" Jackson smiled

"but we cant tell anyone?" i say almost sulking and like i was trying to understand it myself

Jackson bites his maw and taps his paw on the steering wheel, "i have an idea", he opens up his phone and and changed his social media about section to 'dating', "see, and I know its gonna be weird, I just need to figure it out though, its like telling people without telling them, I like you Sam, I really do"

"I like you too" I say in return but before I could grab his paw Bryson and Phil come over to the car and we head on into school, my mind wanders and i wonder how long i can keep up this secret, i was a terrible liar, my skin would go red every time id lie, i was way too obvious, i just hoped no-one would ask me directly.

Its lunch time when Ella calls me out on the way to the lunch hall, "what the heck is going on with you today, something has happened and I'm gonna find out what"

"I'm just happy" I said, "just in a good mood after my party" I offer by way of explanation for my giddiness

"not buying it dork" Ella laughs as we sit at the table, Shannon is sat on her phone and looks over at Ella, "Jackson is dating someone, who the heck is he dating?" she scowls thrusting her phone screen into Ella's face

"no way" she says scrolling through the phone, I can see Jacksons profile and the section he changed this morning, there was already posts on there asking him who, so far he hadn't responded

"he told me he wasn't ready to date anyone, and today he's dating someone, you're on the team with him, tell me what you know!"

I shake my head, "I don't know anything, its first I've heard" I offer as convincing as I can muster

"but he stayed over at yours, did he really not say anything?" Shannon offers

"well, guys don't talk about that sort of stuff, especially with me, you know relationships are kinda off limits, I'm pretty sure they don't wanna hear about boys from me"

"good point, but still who is it" Shannon scowls again at her phone, but the table goes silent as Jackson walks over taking a seat

"did someone die?" Jackson says noticing the silence, Jackson raises an eyebrow and I feel myself blushing, not because I'm embarrassed, but because I know, and I'm a terrible liar.

He shrugs opening his lunchbox with the familiar salad and chicken, Bryson walks over although he looks a little flustered sitting down to the table, "what up" he says taking the space next to Jackson, "like everyone is asking me who you're dating this morning and the thing is I haven't a clue Jackson, what the hell man?"

I can see Jackson is quite uncomfortable now, perhaps he hadn't bargained on his gesture about the inquisitive nature of the school and its incessant need for gossip, Jackson takes a breath "I promise I will tell you, I just cant right now"

"ohh right" he nods looking around the table, like he has sussed something out, but I get the impression he thinks Jackson just cant tell him in front of present company

"well shes certainly making the rumour mill go wild" Bryson says and that's when I know he hasn't figured it out.

I steel a look with Jackson, he's sat across from me and I try and reach under the table for his knee, when I find it I squeeze it gently but he pulls it back and gives me a look like I just attacked him

I wanted to tell him sorry, but trying to communicate without communicating was a difficult art to master, instead the rest of lunch was quite awkward, like everyone was treading on egg shells not quite themselves and the conversation wasn't quite the same.

Even in sports Jackson kept his distance, but I wasn't sure if that was just to keep Eric off my back as he seemed to be lingering around Jackson more than usual and to be honest I didn't mind too much as he seemed less determined to ensure he was on the opposite team to me just so he could tackle me.

But after school was the hardest part of all, I stood near Jacksons car, he was right in front of me, he told me how much he wanted to kiss me right then and there, but as people walked past he eventually said 'ill ring you later' as Bryson and phil wandered out of school together

And as I rode the bus home this was becoming a familiar feeling, Jackson was my new Nathan, he wanted me when we were alone, but that was it, I wanted a boyfriend and I was starting to think perhaps Jackson couldn't be that boy I wanted to be with.

The very thought of it was tearing my heart in two, it had only been a day, I was been selfish I told myself, just because I figured out I liked guys and immediately came out, Jackson didn't have to

But then I started thinking that no-one cares that I'm gay, no one in Jacksons circle of friends anyway, so what would be the problem?

I remembered back to when I first came out, I'd told my best friend, or at least who I thought was my best friend at the time during lunch at school, and by 2pm the whole school knew, and at 3pm my parents were calling in to collect me after I broke down crying when the class started chanting "gay boy"

Its not how I wanted to come out to my parents either, it was probably the worst day of my life, and in truth I was still figuring things out I didn't know I was 100% gay back then I just thought it, but everyone decided I needed to be out there and then.

I couldn't expect Jackson to go through that, I didn't want him to go through that, Jackson would need some time, and I would be there for him

I was so deep in thought I nearly missed my stop, but as I recognised the streets I stood up and pressed the bell for the bus to stop, the driver tutted as I'd not really given him much time to stop and I had to hang on to the rails as the bus stopped sharply.

"thanks" I said stepping off the bus, wondering what the heck i was meant to do.