Love Always, Ella

Chapter Fifteen

Ella

February 19th, 2018

Dear Christian,

Do you remember when we went to that little river that was in the middle of nowhere? I told you I wanted to go on an adventure, and it was always like you to know the perfect spot. You led us through weird trails, and some of them had the prettiest little creeks and streams with sand that was so breathtaking I just had to walk through it barefoot. It was the most beautiful place I had ever been. The weather was perfect that day. Don't you remember? The sun was shining so brightly, but it wasn't hot. There was a breeze that made the strands of the hair in my braid go every which way, and you caught one of those strands and said you loved my hair like that.

Do you remember when you convinced me to go down onto a private dock? I have never trespassed anywhere before, but with you I felt like I was invincible. It felt dangerous, and that's a feeling I've never felt before. We got down onto the bottom of that dock, put our feet in the water, and for the first time in a long time I thought nothing could be better than that moment between us. The silence, the melody of the birds, and the sound of that little creek calmed my mind of all the fears I ever had.

Last week I went to the same little creek we once sat at. Did you know that going there alone doesn't have the same effect? It turns out the melody of the birds doesn't sound like a song anymore. They seemed loud, almost like they didn't want me to be there. The gentle creek now laps heavily, covering all of the pretty rocks we once stared at. I didn't get silence. I didn't get calm.

I guess it turns out that you were the reason it was so calm. You were the melody. You were the peaceful silence.

Now I have nothing.

___________

Another week with Patrick only felt like two days. We've been inseparable ever since the night he apologized, and it wasn't up to me to hang out with him because he wouldn't let me out of his sight. He was outside of my door every single night at around eleven, and from there we'd go onto the beach and stay out there until the early hours of the morning.

Spending every waking second with Patrick made my days so much better knowing there was someone to wake up to. His phone calls are what I live for every night to make sure he gets home okay, and when he came to visit me at work yesterday I didn't know what to say when he held more flowers in his hand, almost looking like the ones he had given to me on our first date.

"For you." He had said, kissing me on the cheek. "I'm sorry, again."

After that my grandparents came into the shack and talked more to him, my grandpa being colder than usual after he found out what happened between us. I know that he's just trying to look out for me, but I wish he were easier on him. Patrick looked like he was going to pass out.

"Maybe you could come over for dinner." My grandpa said. "We could get to know you better and see if you'd be a good fit for Ella."

I don't think I've ever been so embarrassed, and I tried to say no but Patrick shook my grandfather's hand, giving him one of those dazzling smiles that could win anyone over. Having him over for dinner just makes things that much more official that we're together, although I don't think any of his friends know yet. Patrick told the truth when he said we'd stay away from his friends, and now the only one that gives us confused glances is Jess when she works with me and sees him at the shack. He never kisses me in front of her since I'm not too fond of the whole public affection thing, but I still think she knows there's something going on.