Bound By Love, Torn By Loyalty

CHAPTER SEVEN

     Valentines was on a Wednesday, It is now Saturday and I'm getting ready for a party. Yesterday I got an Instagram notification from Tasha. She posted on her story saying how "there hasn't been a party in ages, come to mine at 9, no parents + there's booze" with a plethora of emojis and her in the background the camera getting a high angle of her while covering her face with her hand, as if she was shocked. Everyone seemed to be going, so I took that as a sign to go and get some closure since the last time it didn't work. Perhaps it's too early for this, but we are more mature now, so hopefully we can get past this like it's no big deal. And possibly, or I guess hopefully laugh in the near future. 

     I dress up in an abaya and wear a black sweater with hearts on it. I chose to stay in my comfort zone since I'm already being confident when in reality I tremble just at the thought of talking to them right now. These feelings are particularly new to me since I have always been the confident energetic person in the room.

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     I walk to the doors of Tasha's enormous house. I find her coat closet and stuff my coat in there amongst the multiple other coast and jackets. I find it so weird not taking my shoes off while inside the house as an Asian. She still lives with her parents as she lives near Newat University, which makes it perfect for late night parties. She decorated the place with streamers and balloons, that will soon find its way to the floor by the end of the night. One thing you should know about Tash is that she is a Pinterest freak! So everything here; including the house, food and even the people, is colour coordinated with the conventional red and pink for Valentines. 

     Despite my awe at the beauty of the place I realise, once again, I am truly alone here. I feel a lump in my throat as I walk forward into the scattered lights and lively people. I go around looking for someone, anyone, that I can talk to so I can find out where one of my friends are. If I want to work things out I may as well get it over and done with so I can enjoy the party. 

     I cross many students, some new, some old. Some that I don't even know of, but also a few recognisable faces. I find someone from my dance class and ask her about Nessa. They say they haven't seen her at all. She is probably coming later. I head to the kitchen that's connected to the living room and foyer of Tasha's house hoping to find her there. Knowing her, shes probably still trying to cook up some magic for the party. I mean that half literally half metaphorically. Sometimes it genuinely seems like she used magic to muster up her mouth exploding creations. As expected, once I reached the kitchen, she was making last minute touches of little canapes. The sleeves of her cardigan are rolled up.

     For a minute I'm confused, because she looks up and smiles and says hi. 

     I reply "Hi, what are you making? It looks really good."

     "Looks good right" she replies with a smirk. "But cut the bullshit, I know you want to talk. So talk." Her face suddenly goes serious. 

     "Uhm-" I stumble over my words because of the shock. "I'm sorry. I know you guys are mad and have been ignoring me. I just want everything to be better now. I promise I will do anything to be better." 

     "Hi my love." A person says. I see the back of the head of a black man with curly hair. He's wearing a black hoodie with "I love my girlfriend" on it. My mind freezes for a moment, but soon I realise it's Tasha's boyfriend. He walks across the island for Tasha to wrap her arms around his neck while he snakes his arms around her waist, that gets dangerously close to the hem of her short red pink and red dress, to give her a quick kiss. 

     "Hi." She replies, blushing at the pure sight of him. I also flush at the embarrassment from seeing that. I even turn away to give them a moment and sip on a cup of coke I grabbed while advancing here. I'm struck with a jealousy I have never felt before. I have always seen Tasha with her boyfriend as they have been dating for years now, but now I'm craving for the beauty that they have.

     Off the corner of my eye I see Ivy sitting on the sofa, seemingly alone. I turn around, Tasha's boyfriend still has his arm around her waist. 

     "I'm gonna go say hi to Ivy." I point my thumb over to where she's sitting and awkwardly back off from Tasha. 

     "Okay." Tasha replies.

     Once I am near where Ivy is sitting I make out that she isn't alone. Across her is a tall brunette girl, intimately looking at Ivy, and Ivy only. I do not know this person but Ivy clearly does. I go over and say hi. Ivy seems extra confident today, and I have no idea why. She introduces me to a  girl a year younger than us. Once introductions are over it goes silent. I'm curious to know what they were talking about now, but to reduce the awkward tension I leave and plan to never come back. As soon as I turn around I remember the red solo cup in Ivy's hand probably filled with some sort of alcohol, hence the confidence. A true friend knows that she gets emotional once she has gone over her limit of alcohol, so hopefully she controls herself. 

     Across the room I find what seems to be the back of Amanda's bright scarlet head. I walk over to her planning to actually talk instead of going crimson red and bashfully walk away. Instead I resort to what I had been doing the whole night because Amanda is literally going full on public display of affection with her boyfriend. I do not blame her because I would probably do the same if it wasn't for me being a hijabi. 

     At this point I give up and plan to leave. Either everyone is ignoring me or I am having incredibly bad luck today. I saw Nessa in here multiple times talking to her connection of friends, but I choose not to bother her today as I feel I have done enough to bother her. 

     The next thing I know, Sabrina is running towards me like a child. Her light pink attire with hearts and bows everywhere adds that extra, very well needed, detail to make her look more like a child. Despite it, she does look adorable. I thought she didn't notice me at first but she immediately greets me with, "Sorry a guy was hitting on me and I was cringing so hard and needed to leave ASAP. You were the first person I saw and recognised." I giggle a little, because of course she would cringe at a guy probably calling her beautiful. Then I realise how mad I really am. Why is it that everyone is successful in love besides me. 

     "You know what, I lowkey need to shit but I really don't wanna risk going past that guy again so I'm just gonna stay with you until I'm in the clear." Sab says, completely out of the blue. 

     "Okay sure, we have a lot to talk about anyways." 

     I open my mouth to speak again but a large tall man comes directly in front of us, settles a stool on the floor to step on it and shouts, "OI EVERYONE LISTEN UP." The house goes quiet. with little mutters here and there. "I GOT SOMETHING TO SAY TO MY GIRL YEAH SO YOU BETTER SHUT UP CAUSE MANS GOT NO PATIENCE."

     "Oh. My. God." Sab says. I'm now worried.

     The man shouts again. "Moriam you're actually bare leng and I love you so much. I will always be in love with you, and your fat bunda obviously, but you are actually the greatest person to exist. I know this isn't the best way to confess yeah but just deal with it." Now I am incredibly confused but also thrilled, because why is a man confessing his love for me. 

     He continues, "I don't care if it's too early or if you were expecting this a few days ago on Valentines day but, will you be my girlfriend?"