ISTJ: Be Zooey Deschanel
(I didn't know who this was, so I googled her. I guess the point is that she does a LOT of things )
ISTP: Act like you know what's best for them and then step into their life and do the thing that you think is best for them.
ESTP: Constantly ask them questions about how they feel about things.
ESTJ: Always make dumb jokes or goof off. Or just cry.
ISFJ: Be an overly cocky bad boy. But eventually they'll marry you, so be prepared for that.
ISFP: Be attractive. Now ignore them.
ESFP: Ask "but why" to literally everything they say.
ESFJ: Suggest a lot of obnoxiously novel ideas that obviously won't work while they're trying to make a plan.
INFJ: Flirt with them. "You guys are always talking about how mysterious and invincible we are, but it's literally this easy."
INFP: Start a debate with them that has decidedly nothing to do with social justice.
ENFP: Make them do simple algebra for hours in a room with the classic strict school teacher. No doodling.
ENFJ: Be really mean to them and then assure them that you have no sad back story.
INTJ: Constantly make jokes while using incorrect arguments when they are trying to be serious.
INTP: Literally just go "I am personally offended by that" to everything they say.
ENTP: Be really controlling and close minded.
ENTJ: Just get into a position of power over them and then be really dumb.
