The INFJ door slam is what happens when we are burned out by unresolved emotions, so we resolve the issue by deciding that the relationship is over.
INFJ's are deeply emotional people. They don't feel as much as it looks like they do (that's mirroring which is a whole other topic) but when they feel, they feel deeply and fully.
That means they burn out. If they are emotionally toyed with, abused, or overloaded, and there is no end to the emotional assault in sight, something has to change. Unlike some other types, they can not live with or simply ignore this emotional onslaught. They crave resolution. Whether it's denied or the situation is just ignored- they'll resolve it themselves.
Frequently they'll end emotional ties that overloaded them in the first place. The INFJ door slam is not some abusive act out of anger, it is not an act of revenge. It's an act of self preservation, and once those emotional ties are severed, it is almost impossible to reattach them.
If an INFJ is angry or crying, things can be resolved. If they are coolly friendly and ambivalent... You may have a door slam problem.
