A Reluctant Mate

Aria's POV (18)

It's been seven months since I've been back in the Blood Moon Night pack, no sign of a pup yet, witch was stressing me out, Doctor Anderson checked me out and told me that I was fit and healthy, to witch stressed me out more and to top it all off, our confirmation ceremony is next week.

I was sat outside on the swing, watching some of the young pups playing in the garden, I had mixed emotions, I love hearing them giggling, laughing and having fun. "Morning ma'am" "hello, General Saxon" I said, quickly wiping away a tear that escaped my eye, "everything ok ma'am?" "I'm fine thanks" "I don’t think you are, would you like to talk about it? I know I look like I probably won't listen but I'm a very good listener".

I spilled the beans, I told him all my concerns about not conceiving a pup yet, "please do not worry, you are just settling back down and with the confirmation ceremony getting close, don't stress out about it, there’s plenty of time for pups" "what's going on here?" Ranger said, with Cash in tow, "my brother been badgering you?" "No, we were just talking" I said, Ranger came and sat on the swing next to me, "about what?" "The confirmation ceremony, I was just asking if she was excited" he kept my concerns a secret, witch I appreciated.

Ranger was so busy today, he had meetings all day, with people from our pack and neighbouring packs, there was a young Lycan had found his fated mate in a different pack, the top alphas needed to meet to and request the female to go to the male's pack, normally it's fine but in some instances, the female pack wants some compensation for loosing a member.

I wasn't feeling to well, so once Ranger, Cash and the young Lycan, I think his name was Donovan had left, I went back to bed, it felt like my heat was coming, but after my heats returned after getting back here, they went to every three months, like a normal Lycan, I hadn't long come off my heat so it couldn't be that.

I had stopped going to see Doctor Anderson as I couldn't cope with him telling me that I wasn't pregnant, Ranger had asked me to go at least once a week to find out for sure but the disappointed I feel is crippling, I'm ashamed to tell Ranger every time that I'm not pregnant yet, he says he’s ok with it but deep down, I know he's upset.

I skipped dinner as I was still feeling unwell, Ranger finally got home, gone 10pm, "I heard you didn't have dinner this evening? Your not going back to your old ways of not eating?" "No, I wouldn't do that, I was just not hungry", we started kissing and he tried to roll me on to my back, I pushed him away a little, "not tonight, I don't feel to great" "it's because you haven't eaten dinner" I cuddled up to him, "do you want to go on a run?" I could hear Midnight saying yes in my head, "no, I just want a cuddle".

He didnt say anything, he just pulled me closer, a sick feeling flooded over me, I jumped out of bed and ran into the bathroom, I had only just made it to the toilet to throw up.

"Aria, are you ok?" Ranger said panicked, "I will be fine, go back to bed" "no way, shall I call the doctor?" "No, I will be fine, there must be a bug going around, Rose was sick the other day" I said, standing up, I needed to brush my teeth, I had to brush them twice, "but Rose is heavily pregnant, could you be pregnant? When was the last time you went to see Doctor Anderson?" "Stop, I'm not pregnant, stop talking" I said as I pushed past him, "it's not such a stupid question, you haven't been in weeks, what's the harm in going to get checked out" "JUST STOP, I can't take it anymore, I can't take disappointing you, it breaks my heart every time, seeing you pretend that you don't care that I'm not, I cant take it", I bust into tears.

Ranger came over and comforted me, he put his arm around me and held me tight, I just cried until my eyes couldn't cry anymore, "I'm sorry I've put all this shit onto you about the confirmation ceremony and having pups, I will never, do you hear me, I will never be disappointed in you for anything, pups will come one day and the confirmation ceremony is only for one day, your brothers will be here" I hugged him tighter with the mention of my brothers, "would you like me to send for one?" "Can Dixson come, I really miss him the most" "I will get Cash to send for him in the morning" "thanks" I said kissing his cheek, "in this house, you kiss me here" Ranger said pointing to his lips, "but I was just sick" "you brushed your teeth", I got up on my tip toes and kissed him, he picked me up and I wrapped my legs around him, "Ranger, please take me back to the bathroom, I feel sick again", he took me back in and we sat on the floor.