37 | fate

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A l e x

                The moment her eyes landed on mine, I could feel my heartbeat, every single thumping pound in my tight chest. The hairs arose on my bare arms, making me want to shiver. I knew I was smiling, though I didn't know how. She stared, open-mouthed at me as the photographer took her picture and the crowd applauded. My own hands were clapping together robotically, and despite the anxiety that had arisen the moment I saw her, I couldn't help but feel unimaginably proud of her. She looked happy, genuinely happy. Perhaps it had been a mistake coming back and disrupting her life, just as it was staring to get back on track. I hated myself for being so selfish.

I followed her with my eyes as she eventually shifted on the spot and moved off stage, shaking the mayor's hand hastily on the way down. She looked beautiful in the most sophisticated way.

As she stepped down from the platform, I expected her to walk back to her seat, but in Evie's typical fashion, she surprised me, walking straight down the middle of the aisle towards me. She ignored the curious glances that people gave her, her eyes instead only fixed upon mine. I couldn't read her expression, unsure if it was angry, devastated or delighted. I knew it was unlikely to be the latter, but a small part of me hoped it would be.

Evie came to a stop less than a foot from me as Mrs. Finchley began the second half of the ceremony, talking about the achievements the school had gained throughout the year. My ears drowned it out, as though I had been plunged into a silent room of just the two of us.

I swallowed my nerves as she held my gaze, her eyes moving across my face slowly. After a few moments that had felt like an eternity, she took another step forward and wound her arms around my neck, holding me tightly. It took me by such surprise that for a moment, my own arms remained dangling awkwardly by my side, before I finally found the strength to lift them and snake them round her waist.

"Are you real?" She whispered in my ear, and hearing her voice for the first time in months felt as good as alcohol to an addict.

I smiled into her shoulder, breathing in her deliciously sweet scent. "I hope so," I whispered back, my eyes lifting and scanning the crowd. No one appeared to be watching us, but a part of me decided not to care even if they were.

She eventually unwound herself from me and took a step back, looking up at me with a childlike vulnerability that flooded me with guilt.

"I'm so sorry, Evie," I whispered, my eyes stinging as I stared at her beautiful, sad complexion.

Evie pursed her lips, looking down at the ground with a very small nod of her head. "Are you leaving again?"

"I'm staying until the end of the day. We can talk after the ceremony, okay?" I promised quietly, reaching down and winding my pinky around hers. I squeezed gently.

"Okay," she breathed, pulling her hand away and looking me for one moment longer. Then, she walked past me, moving around the back of the church and up the side of the pews to the front, returning to her seat calmly.

I watched her intently, wondering how it was possible that even the back of a person's head could be mesmerising.

The following half an hour was painstaking, though I tried to maintain my plastered smile as Mrs. Finchley spoke about the year's accomplishments. I found myself checking my watch incessantly, desperate for time to quicken. And yet, I was so terrified to speak with Evie, for lack of any words that I could say that would possibly make things better. I knew I had ruined things beyond belief, but I hoped that she would at least be prepared to understand my reasoning.

"Okay, that brings us to the end of this year's graduation ceremony. There will be food stalls outside and group pictures taking place, also. Thank you so much all for coming, and to the class of '18, I wish you all the best of luck. It has been wonderful getting to know you all."

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