𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔 - regulus black

chapter thirty-four

The sickness didn't leave Ariel anymore. As well as the sadness. He was living with it, bearing it. It was such a burden. He hated living with this. He would cry harder everyday, fearing his future more and more. The absence of Regulus in his life was also weighing him down. He felt so lonely. Being alone had never been pleasant before, but he now knew what it was to be lonely. The void in him couldn't be filled as long as Regulus couldn't be with him. But it would still last for long and long weeks and he knew it.

He felt pathetic as he watched his reflection in the mirror of his bedroom. Pale, clearly restless, his face slightly hollowed. He caught a glimpse of his eyes. Redness everywhere. It stung. The effects of crying so much, he thought sourly. Ariel felt ashamed Regulus might ever hear about this. Crying so weakly over his absence. It proved one thing: he was dependent.

The blond boy found it hard writing regularly to Regulus. It would become rarer and rarer without ceasing for the meantime. More and more Regulus started asking for news about Ariel which the boy found difficult to give. He would ignore his questions until Regulus' words became a demand and not a question anymore.

'Dear Ariel,

I cannot bear not knowing about you. I love your poems but I want you to stop hiding behind them. Do not hide from me anymore, talk to me.

Take good care of you,

Regulus'

He knew he couldn't back away anymore. Regulus was most likely angered at Ariel for avoiding his questions all this time.

'My dear Regulus,

I miss you and I am sad.

Ariel'

His feelings were much more complexed but it was a beginning. At least he had opened up for the first time in weeks.

Later that day, his mother came into his room to announce their family had got invited to a party organized by the Selwyns this time. Ariel almost wept to her feet when she told him. He begged her again, claiming that he was still feeling unwell and his mother got worried and confused. She was very caring and hated to see her children suffer. She tried to get Ariel to speak but he had suddenly gone mute. He couldn't tell her anything, no matter how much he wanted to.

"I'm sorry Mother. I really can't tell you."

"Fine. I'll go tell your father you're exempted from this party but we should have a talk soon."

He agreed. He could only agree. He was glad at least his mother was being so nice to him.

The day after the party he hadn't attended, he was back to doing nothing. His days consisted of smoking, reading, talking to his elf, crying and re-reading Regulus' letters while both smoking more and crying more. And when he could, he was eating or sleeping but these were not his main activities. That day he was sitting by his window, watching as the autumn rain was falling from the stormy sky that reminded him so much of Regulus' eyes that he adored. He was smoking and thinking when suddenly, a knock was heard on his door.

He was expecting either his mother or elf to come in, but it was with surprise that Daisy Parkinson entered the room. He watched her slowly walk in the room, his eyes wide.

"Daisy? What are you doing there?"

"I heard my fiancé was sick. As a good future wife I shall look after him of course," she replied, her voice sweet but her face remaining emotionless.

"That's really nice of you, as you can see I am fin-"

"But you don't look fine," she interrupted curtly.