𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔 - regulus black

chapter thirty-five

The dark feelings residing in Ariel hadn't left him. But he changed. His conversation with Daisy had surprisingly helped a lot. He wasn't as terrified and as anxious about the future anymore though he still wished life was different.

He still missed Regulus a lot. But cried less. He was still not getting used to the loneliness. But as November started, he knew it was only a matter of days before he would meet again with the boy he adored.

His mother had been worried and had often tried to talk with him. But Ariel wasn't ready. It took him a while to ponder over what felt right or not regarding this situation. He realized his mother couldn't stay unknowing about her son's gloomy and depressed state.

"Mother. I think I'm ready to talk..." announced the boy as he entered her study. The door was left ajar, she was probably waiting for him until he was ready.

She was once again sitting on her sofa, reading. It was the evening now, the room was well lit up. It felt weird as Ariel's bedroom stayed mostly dark or lit with dim lights.

"Come sit here darling," she said kindly, patting the spot by her side.

He followed her words and went to sit down with her. She was smiling, showing reassurance which she thought might help him feel at ease. And Ariel truly felt at ease with her.

"Mother. I like someone that isn't Daisy. Nor Ivanna Flint if you thought it was her..." started the boy.

"Oh, well. Thank you for letting me know. Could you tell me who then?" she continued encouragingly with her sweet voice.

"I..." This time, Ariel found it hard to speak. He tried to take deep breaths to help calm down his nerves but it seemed impossible. He blinked his eyes a few times, trying to suppress the sudden urge to cry as he was about to admit his love for Regulus, his deepest secret.

His mother looked at him worryingly, a small smile on her face. And suddenly she seemed to understand his distress. She placed a comforting hand on his back and rubbed it. "Is it Regulus?" she whispered.

Ariel lifted up his teary blue eyes to look at her with surprise. "Yes... It's Regulus that I like..."

"Well. It's somehow surprising... "

"How did you know?"

"It was just an intuition. I'm your mother Ariel, I know you..."

"Is it wrong?" he asked, his voice shaking a little.

"Wrong? No, I don't think it's wrong. But I would have preferred this not to happen..." her voice cracked a little at the end of her sentence. Tears started falling from her eyes as well. "What did I do for you to like boys..." she whimpered weakly as she embraced her son.

"Nothing Mother. It's not your fault, it's only me..."

Ariel felt heartbroken by her reaction, he couldn't deny it, but he was glad she wasn't rejecting him.

"Don't tell your father, it's better..."

"I know. I won't."

Ariel who loved his mother dearly felt extremely guilty for making her sad and hurt. He had never wanted this, he just opened up to her like she asked him to, and because he felt the need to. He also felt guilty for thinking such reaction was better than rejection.

The relationship between Ariel and his mother had changed. Ever since he had been honest with her, it felt awkward between them. But he didn't regret opening up to her and she somehow felt happy that her son had enough courage to tell her his deepest secret.

November brought more cold and more rain. To Ariel, it brought more loneliness as well. He was eagerly waiting for Regulus to answer his last letter though it didn't seem to come. The day he received news from him was surprisingly unpleasant.

It was in the middle of the night. Ariel was asleep, trying to get some rest, until he got woken up by commotion in his room. He jolted up in his bed and grabbed his wand on the bedside table at his right. He lit it up and pointed it where the noise came from. He could feel his heart beat quickly in shock and maybe fear.

The blond boy discovered there a house elf. And not any house elf. Kreacher, the elf of the Black household and also Regulus' elf. The creature was shaking and bleeding. He was crouched on the floor, water dripping from him. Ariel got out of his bed and called out, "Kreacher?" quietly, as to not brisk the creature.

He looked up, his eyes wide in fear and only muttered, "M-mister Ariel..."

"What are you doing here?" he quickly asked in an urgent tone, walking up to him.

The elf remained quiet except for his sobs and gave a letter to Ariel. It was from Regulus he noticed.

'Ariel,

Kreacher appeared to me tonight in this state. He was out on the mission the Dark Lord requested an elf for and clearly got mistreated. Could you please take care of him while I am in Hogwarts? Try to find out what happened.

Regulus'

The words were written in a shaky handwriting, different from Regulus' usual neat handwriting. He must have been in a terrible state of anxiousness at this moment.

Ariel did his best to heal the poor elf. He wondered what could have make him in such state. When he tried to interrogate him, the elf would start panicking in fear and whimpering louder.

Once he was done, he put the poor creature to rest and wrote something to Regulus who was probably waiting impatiently for news about his beloved elf.

'Regulus,

Kreacher arrived at my house and I took care of him as best as I could. He calmed down and went to take some rest. I tried questioning him but in vain, he is still in shock and probably traumatized by whatever happened to him. Tomorrow, I will try again and send you more news.

Do not get too worried about his condition, I will take care of him.

Ariel'

That night, Ariel didn't sleep. He had lent his bed to the elf and his mind wouldn't let him rest anyway. He thought and thought. He remembered when, still in the summer, the Dark Lord requested the help of a house elf for an activity kept secret. That was all the Death Eaters got to know. Pushed by Bellatrix, Regulus offered with pride to use Kreacher for that special mission, claiming he was a good elf, very loyal and such. The boy would have never expected to find his elf, his oldest friend, as important as family, to be used so cruelly. Even Ariel felt pity for the poor elf. Something very serious had happened for the elf to be left to die. The Dark Lord must have thought he was of no use anymore.

Without more details regarding this, Ariel could difficultly make out a possible hypothesis as to what happened. He had to wait for the elf to wake up and he would ask him more. If he was able to speak of course.

author's note: coming outs can't be difficult, ariel waited until he felt safe to do so and i guess that's the best thing to do. i hope all my lgbtqi+ readers are safe! 

anyway the story is taking a turn and we're approaching the end...