Desiring You

Chapter 45

Miley

After a night full of tossing and turning, I finally decided to leave the room.
The unchanged decoration of the room sent a wave of pain in my heart. Walking to the kitchen, I saw the dinner we ordered, wasn't eaten by any of us.
I prepared a coffee for me and sat on the couch. Unwillingly, I turned my head to see the closed room of Aiden.
The anger in me stopped me from going in his room to talk and I took a sip from my coffee.

As the last drop of coffee went in my mouth, I heard another sneeze from his room.
Making my way back to the kitchen, I grabbed ginger, honey and tea leaves to make tea. Even though thinking about him saddened me but hearing his condition saddened me more.
After transferring the boiled tea in the cup, I carefully took it and entered his room. My eyes fell on Aiden who was curled around the blanket.

Another sneeze forced its way out of his mouth and I took soft steps towards him.

"Aiden" I whispered.

He shot his head towards my side, looking over his shoulder at my face.

I put the cup on the nightstand and sat next to him on the bed.

"Miley" he said, getting up and looking straight in my eyes. His hands reached to hold my hand, as he started speaking,"baby I am so sor-"

"Not now Aiden. We will talk about this later."

I picked the cup up and handed it to him who was staring at my face.
"Are you going to break up with me?" He mumbled, now looking down at his cup.

"No, Aiden" I said and checked his temperature which was a little high. "We will talk about it later, I promise."

Nodding, he took a sip and instantly pushed the cup towards me.

"You caught cold, you have to drink it" I said pushing it back to him gently.

Ignoring my words, he kept the cup on the nightstand and scooted closer to me. Wrapping his arms, he snuggled his face in the crook of my neck and mumbled several apologies. I was left with no other option but to hug him back and rub my hands on his back.

"The whole night I was regretting the words I should have never said to you" he raised his head away from me to sneeze and then put his head on my shoulder facing away from me.

"But you did" I blurted and instantly regretted when his arm tightened around my body.

"But I did."

"You should drink the tea, Aiden" I advised which was ignored again.

"I was angry Miley, not on you but on him. I was infuriated at his shamelessness. I hated how he was in my house like there was nothing wrong between us, like he never abandoned me."

"What?"

"I will tell you everything but before that let me apologize" he said detaching us from each other.
He held my hand again and looked deep into my eyes.
"I am so sorry for being an a*shole last night, for treating you harshly, and for using a very sensitive topic against you. I promise to never repeat this type of behavior again in any type situation."

He sniffled again while waiting for me to reply.
"Apology accepted" I smiled and was about to lean in to plant a kiss but was abruptly halted when he sneezed right on my face.

"I. Am. Gonna. Kill. You" I said wiping the drops of saliva from my face.

"I am sorry" he said raising his hand to wipe a drop from my left cheek. "I couldn't control it."

"I hate you" I swatted his hand in anger and got up from the bed to the bathroom. "You better drink that tea before I come out."

*

After we both finished our breakfast, which was the dinner we both left untouched last night, Aiden picked up the plates and left.

As he returned, he sat next to me and intertwined our hands.
"My mother was an amazing mother. She was the one who taught me basketball. I remember, when I was nine I cried for like an hour when she blocked me from throwing the ball, since then she stopped blocking" he chuckled as he looked at me and then continued "but good things never long last in my life. When I was twelve, she was diagnosed with lung cancer..." His hand shifted to my waist leading me on his laps. His head rested on my shoulder as I was straddling him. My hands were caressing his arms while his were under my shirt resting on my back.

"After she died, dad stopped coming home. He stopped seeing me, we didn't talk for months... I needed him after mom's death. I wanted to share my despair with someone but there was none. He stayed by my side for some hours on my birthday every year but we never exchanged any words, guess we were too used to not talk by then. Soon, I accepted that I lost both my dad and mom. Years after, he started talking to me again like everything was normal, like he never abandoned me in the most vulnerable moment of my life. But as soon as I was an adult, I left that house I once called home."

"He never stopped you? From leaving, I mean."

"He did, but I ignored him the same way he did. He tried to visit me but I blocked him from my life. And then he quitted visiting me too except on any occasion... I-I can't... Forgive him... M-Miley... It hurts too much... To even think about the days I cried alone on bed..."

Silently, I hugged him as he cried on my shoulder.

"Am I wrong for doing that? Am I wrong for not forgiving him?" He asked.

"You are not wrong Aiden, you are hurt that he left you alone when you needed him the most..." I paused and cupped his face between my hands. "You know you were right when you said I have a soft spot for all the dads in the world because you are not going to like the next thing I will say to you... You should talk to him. Ask him or better, yell at him for leaving such an amazing boy, for not being with you. At least talk to him Aiden."

"Why? I don't want to talk to him. He is nothing to me" he pushed my hands away from his face.

"Did you ever talk to him after your mom died?"

"No, beca-"

"Exactly. Aiden I know this is hard for you because you are angry at him but you should at least talk to him. Communication is seriously underestimated, but it is a very essential part in relationships. You talk to him and then you can decide whether to forget about the past and initiate a new start or stay the same."

He looked at me with his displeased eyes, and said "you sound completely biased. Do you think that I am behaving childishly and I don't have a valid reason to leave him?"

"I am not biased, Aiden. But I do know how it feels to lose both parents, and I am glad at least you have one by your side who at least tries to resolve the problems. Mine doesn't even think. And no, your reasons are not childish. You have a right to stay mad at him but I want you to talk to hi-"

"I don't want to talk to him. That's it. End of the conversation."

"Why? Why do you not want to talk to him?"

His eyebrows furrowed as he stared at me.
"I just told you the reason."

"Then tell me where was he after your mom's death?"

"Probably drinking somewhere" he muttered in annoyance.

"Probably?"

"Miley, I don't want to tal-"

"Is it because you doubt that you could be wrong and you don't have the guts to face him and realise your own mistakes? You are scared of the consequences, are you?"

I stared at him, looking at his eyes but he didn't speak. He leaned his head to the crook of my neck, hiding from me.