sefirin kiz

chapter 15

Appointment day

Nare dressed and was looking for something in her bag. She was searching frantically, when gediz appeared. He asked her 'what happened? Why are you looking so worried?'

'I am looking for melek's custody document, I had kept in the purse' she said while rummaging through the contents of her purse.

'oh' expressing so gediz went inside the study and came back with the document in his hand. He held it infront of her and said 'don't worry, it was safe with me'

Nare gave a sigh of a relief and smiled as her tension eased. 'I got so scared'

'don't worry, so you are ready'

She bowed her head indicating her readiness to go. Gediz cleared the way for her and followed behind her. He kept the document in the study back again.

In the car,

When Nare was pulling her seatbelt she asked gediz 'will you come with me inside'

'no, the appointment is only with you'

'what do I tell him about us'

'the truth'

She had a quizzical expression

Gediz replied 'well tell him you are married to me but out of compulsion. You have been forced to be with me due to your dad. This marriage is not working for you and you would divorce in 7-8 months.'

She looked at him. He appeared unaffected, he looked ahead and concentrated on driving. His hands were holding the steering wheel tightly and his thumb beating on it. She saw his blazer gently draping his upper torso. She couldn't gauge his feelings, his shades masked his eyes well. She forced herself to take her eyes off him. She felt his strong presence around her. She had been on the front seat of his car so many times before, she never felt this way. Even though nothing had changed, but she was sensing something which she couldn't put to words.

Gediz stopped the car near the psychologist clinic and Nare unbuckled her seatbelt. Gediz said 'call me in an hour and I will come to pick you up. I am around in this area' Nare acknowledged with bend of her head. She was a bit anxious. She got down and straightened the creased skirt and hair. She took a deep breath and looked towards the clinic. Her heart was pacing fast and she did want to avoid going there, but she mustered up her courage and walked towards the clinic. The sun was bright and warm. Warmth of the sun boosted her courage.

There was a lady at reception. Nare introduced herself and informed her of the appointment. She asked her to wait on the chair in the waiting area. Nare seated herself in a comfortable chair and waited. In sometime, a lady in her 30s wearing blue linen shirt, black trouser and white coat came smiling towards her. She went upto her, Nare got up seeing her and the lady introduced herself ' Hello! I am Ana, the psychologist'

'hello, I am Nare'

'good to meet you Nare, would you like to follow me'

'sure'

The psychologist guided her to her office. It was a simple office, the décor was very calming. The walls were painted white and the monotony of the white was broken with seascapes painting on canvas. There was a grey coloured couch with cushions. There were 2 armchairs opposite the couch and in between chair and couch was a glass table with some magazines carelessly lying on it.

The psychologist offered her to sit on the couch and she sat opposite her in the chair. Nare settled herself on the couch, but due to tension in her body she sat upright. The psychologist spoke to her and asked her about the reason of her visit? She asked her about her past. She asked her to start from her childhood. Nare started narrating from what she remembered as a child. She told her about her father, mother, her friendships and sancar. She asked her who is sancar? Nare narrated her about sancar with a smile on her face. She told her how she met him for the first time and how he became inseparable part of her life. The psychologist said before we come to sancar can we talk a little a bit more about your mother and father. Nare told her about her mother's death, which she had to face early in life when she was just 16 yrs. She told her about the big void that her mother left in her life. She grew overnight after her death. She couldn't help mentioning her father's attitude towards her, which changed. She said 'on a hindsight, I sometimes think my father probably thought my mum died early because of me.'