Undead Mute

Nineteen

"Control your anger. If you kill him then you will regret it." Aaron tells me.

I shake my head indicating that I won't regret a thing. I start heading towards my father but Aaron grabs onto my arm roughly, before pulling me back. I glare up at him as he narrows his eyes down at me.

"You're a kid. You're angry. I get it, but you will regret this. Don't do this." Aaron tells me seriously.

I shake my head again as I try to pull free from his hold but he wouldn't let go. I grit my teeth together as he kept his eyes narrowed at me as I struggled. Let me go! I screamed at him in my mind. I hate this! He's stopping me from killing him and I hate it! He needs to die. He has to die!

"Loki please listen to Aaron. You can't kill your father. What if you change? What if you aren't the same?" Savanna asks breaking my thoughts.

I stop struggling as I look over at Savanna, and notice that the twins are standing next to her as well. They all have looks of worry, sadness, and fear written across their faces. I stare at them as a memory of meeting them comes flashing back.

"I'm not going to hurt you. I'm Savanna and I came here to get some food, but then I saw you eating that raw steak." She explains to me.

"I'm Alex. I'm the one who radioed for help, and this is my sister Alice." Alex introduced themselves.

I shake my head as I look away from them as I glanced over at my father whose still unconscious. If I don't kill him, how will I get rid of this burning hatred that keeps rising up? I flinch when I felt hands close around my hand, and by the scent, I knew it was Savanna. I glance over at her seeing her have a look of disdain across her face. I felt guilty that I'm the one who made her feel that way. I felt Aaron let my other arm go, and the moment he does Savanna pulls me into a tight hug.

I tense as the last time we were this close I got an urge to bite her. I try to push her back but she squeezed tighter around me. I look away trying to push the urge back when I felt it coming. I kept trying to push her back but then I felt her body tremble. I glance over at her and notice tears sliding down her cheeks. I flinch as I never saw her cry before and I don't know what to do in this situation.

"Please, Loki don't change. Don't kill your father." Savanna whimpers.

I stare at her as the urge is getting stronger and I gulp as I want to hug her back. I want to make her feel better, but with this urge, I'm afraid I will bite her. I push her back before stepping away from her as I rub the back of my head awkwardly. Savanna stares up at me but seems to understand why when I try to avoid her eyes. I close my eyes as her scent still fills my nostrils and the urge isn't dying down, but I need for it to go away. I want to kill my father, not Savanna. She's my friend. I kept my distance from her as I try to think on what to do because I know they won't leave me alone.

My father needs to die.

"Let's get out of here." Aaron says breaking the silence.

I turn to him but he's already staring at me with a warning look that says to not fight him again. I let out a sigh as I glance over at my father who is starting to stir. My anger and hatred started to build up again, but I can't do anything with them here. I will have to come back and finish the job later. Alone. I will have to plan it better than I did the last time, but for now, I have to go with them. I nod to Aaron as we start to head for the door, but we all stop when we heard my father let out a painful groan.

"Aa-Aaron?"

Aaron tenses before looking behind him with a hateful look in his eyes. My father stares back with no emotion, and I can tell that I broke his nose. I smile knowing I at least done some damage but wipe it away when his stare turns towards me. I glare daggers at him as hatred bubbles inside of me as I stare into my father's blue emotionless eyes.

"Jayden? You aren't going to kill me?"

I flinch at my real name and took a step towards him but stop when I felt a hand grab onto my arm. I turn towards the hand before following it up to see that it's Savanna. I look away quickly as the urge hasn't fully left yet, but it's starting to come back again. I glare up at my father again as he tries to sit up but groans out in pain. I want to kill him so badly. I thought with hatred. He's right there I can do it. I should do it. But. I glance back towards Savanna's hands still wrapped around my arm and knew I can't do it in front of them. I won't forgive myself if I killed my father in front of them. I let out a sigh as I turn away and walked out of the room. I felt my hatred rising and I felt pissed that I couldn't finish the job, especially when I was so close.

"Thank you, Loki." Savanna whispers as she walks next to me.

I ignore her as I try to push down my anger and the urge. It's getting too much and I hate that everything is happening all at once. I hate this. I hate my father. I hate this urge. I hate being a fucking zombie. I tense as I felt a hand touch my shoulder stopping me, and I look back to see that it's Aaron. I notice that he has anger and guilt in his eyes.

"I'm sorry." Aaron tells me simply.

I'm not quite sure what he's apologizing for but I just nod anyway. I went to walk away but he stops me again before turning me towards him. I stare up at him with confusion.

"I'm serious. I'm sorry about everything. Your father, you getting turned like this, and I know you wanted to kill him. I know you're probably angry at us, but trust me killing him is pointless." Aaron tells me seriously.

I tilt my head confused as to how is killing my father, and getting revenge on what he's done to me pointless? If anything, he deserves a slow painful death for everything he has done. He needs to pay for what he's done.

"Jayden, your father is already dying slowly as it is." Aaron tells me saying my real name.

I flinch again realizing that I don't like being called by my real name. Then I realized what he said, and I stare up at him with furrowed eyebrows in confusion. How is he already dying slowly? I wonder as I try to think back to how he looked. Missing arm. Dried blood. Looks exhausted. Maybe from blood loss, but I know it's not from that.

"Your father has cancer."

———

We traveled back towards the crack in the wall in complete silence. I couldn't get what Aaron told me back inside the building out of my mind. My father has cancer, so he's already dying slowly, and that's why he doesn't care if I kill him. I shake my head as this doesn't make sense. He injected me with his stupid serum and wasn't surprised when I came to kill him. He knew. He knew I would come back as a zombie, and he knew I would come back to kill him. He might have cancer, but he still somehow planned all of this. He knew I would come back as a zombie, and he knew I would come back to kill him.

He wanted this zombie apocalypse to happen.

The question is why though? I shake my head as it doesn't matter. I still hate him and either way he's going to die. The question is how? Do I kill him, or let cancer kill him? I clench my fists as I do want to kill him, but he wants that. The best option is to let cancer take him. I let out a sigh and realized that if I want cancer to take him, then I at least want some honest answers from him first.

I shake my head as we made it back to the crack in the wall, and this time everyone made sure that I went in first. I glance towards the building again before squeezing through the crack in the wall. The stench of my dried blood brought up memories but I push them back. I don't want to recall any more memories when they keep coming back to haunt me.

When I made it to the other side though I felt like I could finally breathe. Well, for a short while at least. I look up not expecting to see them here, and they don't look happy. When the others came over and stood beside me, they look up with the same shocked expression I have.

"You guys have some explaining to do." Mandy tells us sternly.