55 What Do I Want?

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Mind's wounds serve a pain that's is not seen or believed to be true

It holds scars that's not visible but are shown on the way I behave and perceive

In my wounded mind, I am always haunted by my past's Ghosts

Where every mistake I did is an irreversible sin

That's leading me to repeat and relive the same melancholic scenes

Don't know how to calm my irrational thoughts, feelings and loud screams

Because i want to let go and burn all the bridges

I want to make firm decisions and stand by myself and show dedication

I want to empty my mind's drawers and let trauma just teach me the lesson

What else do I want?

Ah yes

I want to stop all the criticism that I keep convincing myself is just brutal honesty to go for change

I want to recognize all my small wins and put perfection in box and let it in the ocean sink

I want to take all the action that will leads to the embodiment of all my wishes

I want to stop undermining the way I try to push myself to work

I want to believe that I have a smart mind that is able to craft words to art

I want to stop wondering where the remained closed doors could have ever led me to, and start opening all these doors

I want to pat myself on the shoulder and thank me for winning all the battles that no one knew about

I want to stop Settling for self sabotage, because it is easy to let myself down than others

I want to believe in forever and work to become better

I want to stop feeling home sick because the home I am longing for, is me

I want to learn the art of staying and building strong relationships

I want to be that kind of happy, where I keep room for all my mes

I just want to be comfortable in being all the conflicting characters that form me

Is that so difficult to achieve!

Or does this poem serve as the new beginning of being me!

May life in front of you unfolds, and satisfaction may it bring, what ever is going on, I am sure you will eventually live happily 💐

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May life in front of you unfolds, and satisfaction may it bring, what ever is going on, I am sure you will eventually live happily 💐

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