Chapter 24
●Nokukhanya Ngwenya
If I knew that my life would turn out like this, i would have requested a uber for myself seriously. I should have ran away from this man from the word go. I blame myself for being here and being accused of being touched by a married man, ‘Well he was touching you and you were enjoying it.'
Argh!
Yeah so, I was, so what? I did not ask him to do what he did.
I watch my baby still hooked onto machines and the beeping sound from the machine is irritating me. Sitting here brings tears to my eyes. I should have been there when she got sick maybe we wouldn’t be here right now. If I didn’t go out with her uncle and dance on top of the table, oh I’m still trending by the way. If I ignored Lindokuhle that day, my baby would be in my arms right now and blessing me with her sweet giggles.
Only If.
“I am so sorry, baby. Please wake up for Mommy.” I whisper to her, knowing that I will not get any reply from her or hear her giggles breaks my heart. I sit in silence my hand still caressing her, wishing for a miracle. Despite everything we’ve been through this couple of days, especially with her father and her being here, I’m very grateful that she is still alive. I swear if I would lose her, her death will be mine as well, I would die with her.
I think I’m getting sick.
****
I have been sick for about a month now, it’s so weird one day I’m fine and the next its back to me throwing up and all that. My daughter is out of hospital now. She was discharged after I threw a tantrum when they wanted to put her in a coma to monitor her. I mean what the fuck is that, how can they even suggest that to me. Langa had to beg and beg me, but I put my foot down. This is my baby, and till she is old enough to make her own decision I will be doing it for her. If that other woman decided that was okay for their son that doesn’t mean that is okay for my daughter as well. Langa is something else I tell you, one minute he is making all the decision then one minute she is pulling him by his nose, just like my sickness.
I am sick and worse part I don’t know what is wrong with me. Stress maybe.
After my outburst, I suggested that we took her to his home, back to his roots. We are black people and if the western medicine and Doctors can’t find anything wrong with her then we need to go back to our roots and consult our own people. Mrs. Gumede was for all this the moment I mentioned it. The only problem I have is her father. I don’t know whats wrong with him, even his brother is not talking to him. That is why I am here now at his home to speak to him, more like beg him to help our daughter.
I’ve been sitting in my car for almost fifteen minutes, thinking if I am doing this or not. I just don’t want any problems with his wife, that woman can drive me crazier.
A knock on my window startles me.
Its him.
“Are you ever going to come in?” He asks after I roll down my window and the breeze bring me back to this moment with him here. I need to help my daughter and if means begging him, so be it. It’s for our daughter.
“Uhm… yeah… I mean…uhm Langa… eish this is hard.”
“You can’t beg, can you. It irks you begging people for help, especially me.” I open my door and come out.
