She began to fear every sound since she had met him. With every step she looked over her shoulder. Fear of him kept her wary. Trying to run from the nightmare he put her through was all that mattered, but the pain of being away from half of your sou...
It's been a week since my talk with Hope. I know that she's right and that my heat could be anytime now, but I'm still holding off on it for now. I'm still hoping there's a way that I can get through this without him. I've been doing research online and at the library and while I've discovered some great new authors, I haven't learned anything useful about how to solve my problem. However, I've gotten a lot of information about how rejection works. It seems to me that alphas are always jerks who love rejecting their mates. It also seems that rejected mates always go through a punk phase and learn how to box or something. Apparently being the best 'fighter' in the pack makes you a lot more desirable. This may be useful information in another scenario however, I'm not really interested in making myself hotter, in fact that is practically the opposite of what I'm trying to achieve. I know that Hope said the amount of sleeping pills it would take could kill me, but I'm starting to think that it may be worth a shot. I just don't know what to do and neither option is appealing. I think the best thing I can do right now is go back to library for more information. I pack my things and get ready to go. This has been a nice change of pace for me at least. All the research gives me an excuse to leave the house. I don't feel entirely safe, but the new reasoning motivates me. I've decided to keep mace in my purse these days, I'm not sure what that do against the wolf but it's worth a shot. I have three locks on the door now to keep out any unwanted visitors. I do have to admit it's a bit of a hassle but it's worth the trouble. I make my way to the lobby and out the door. Walking down the street I swear everyone's eyes are on me. Paranoia is driving me mad. Luckily the library isn't far. I step inside immediately go to the section in question. The reference section hasn't been much help, so I've had to resort to the fiction. I can't be sure how much of it is real but it's better than nothing. I grabbed a book I haven't read before and find a comfortable chair to sit in. I sit and read until the library closes. That book didn't tell me anything new, so I guess I'll be doing more research online tonight. I put the book back on the Shelf and start on my way back home. I feel more watched then before and clutch my bag closer to myself. I turn corner and see a group of boys. They stop talking and stare at me. Take a few steps back before turning and walking the other way. "Hey there do you need some help?", I hear one of them say. I start to walk faster. "Ma'am did you drop this?", looking over my shoulder I see a boy holding my wallet. I smile awkwardly it him, "oh yes thank you". I take the wallet from his outstretched hand and turn to walk away once again. "Ma'am are you okay?", he says, "I don't mean to bother you but you seem a little on edge, is everything all right?". "Yeah I'm fine", I say. "You don't seem fine", he says, "can I walk you home?". I turn back to face the boy. He looked genuinely concerned, but I wasn't born yesterday. "No thanks", I tell him. I don't mean to be rude, but I have enough problems and don't need to add a potential axe murderer to the list. I turn away and walk faster. He begins to set pace with me and walks by my side. "Hey listen my name is Breugair, and you just seem a little out of sorts", he says. I stop walking and glare at him, "I don't need or want your help, go back to your friends!", I shout at him. Why can't the guy accept a simple no? "Breuer she isn't worth it", says one of the guys. I hadn't realized that they'd all started to tail us. He shrugs and smiles at me before going back. I pull out my phone and call Hope. It's nice to know if they did anything that at least I'd still have a witness. "Hello", she says, "is everything alright". "Yeah I just wanted to make a social call", I tell her, "how was your day?". "Oh you know just more of the same", she says, "today at the clinic I helped deliver a baby, gave stitches to a guy who was in a small motorbike accident, and revived a man who had a heart attack". I reach my apartment's door and go inside. I lock the door behind me and go to sit on my couch. "I don't know how you do it", I say smiling. "Well I just like to keep busy", she says, "I just used to that kind of lifestyle". How her life began is honestly a tragedy, but I really admire how she turned things around. It's inspirational that she made something so positive of herself. "Hope I don't know how you do all that, but you're amazing", I tell her. "I just want to help people", she says, "It just really gives me a sense of purpose".
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