Chapter Three

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Johnathan

No way! no way! Carter Lendor can't just come in my home and spew bullshit like that. When I finally got my breathing and coughing under control I attacked him. His eyes went wide when I tackled him onto the couch and punched like a wild man. He tried to hold my arms but I got in a couple of good ones to his head and chest before we rolled off the couch and onto the floor.

Carter ended up over me pinning both my arms over my head, his hip cradled smack dab between my legs. I was a bit..ok a lot tired after my tirade. Alcohol and movements don't cooperate with each other.

"Jonathan. I love you. I've loved you since the first moment I laid eyes on you. You had on a t shirt that read 'may the force be with you' and I asked you if you liked star wars and you said 'na this was all I had clean to wear'." we both laughed as I said the words with him.

"You don't love me Carter." I began because seriously who the hell tortures the person they claim to be in love with.

"I know what I feel Johnathan. I know that I love you. My heart knows. My brain knows. Even my cock knows." he pressed down against my crotch and damn did his dick know he loved me. I bit my lower lip forcing in the moan I wanted release at the feel of his body pressed so intimately against mine. "I was a stupid kid in love and I didn't know what to do with it. I asked my mom one day about the funny feelings I got every time I was around a certain someone and she confirmed that I was in love."

Carter helped me up and we sat side by side against the couch on my fluffy carpet. "Then at the end of freshman year my uncle Wes came to stay with us to help my dad build the porch mom wanted at the back of the house. Uncle Wes was very religious so every time any mention of a guy liking a guy that way my uncle would start saying stuff about how it's wrong and a sin. How gays should all be shot or burned and they would all go straight to hell." Carter's fists clenched at his side.

I don't know what came over me but feeling Carter tremble and clench his fists like that scared me a bit so I pried open his fingers and laced them back with mine and I rested my head on his shoulder. He let out another big breath. "I began resenting you for making me feel like that. I hated that I couldn't stop feeling the way I felt about you. so I decided that I would make you pay for making me feel this way. But every time I pushed you or tackled you I made sure I copped a feel. I'd follow you around under the guise of waiting to make my next move to embarrass you." Carter ran his thumb over the back of my hand and the motion was so soothing.

"Do you remember Leo Dill?" he asked. I wracked my brain then it came to me. The only friend I made apart from Lisa.

"Yea! you beat him up in the car park. Then he transferred." I said narrowing my eyes at him.

"Well he was new to our school and then bam every minute I see you he's attached at the hip. I hated the way he made you smile and carry your books for you. I wanted to be the one to do that. I got so jealous. And that's when I decided that if I can't have you then nobody else will. What better way than to make sure nobody looked at you the way Leo did than to spread rumors? I was the cool kid back then so no one dared defy me. If I said you were ugly everyone agreed." I glared at the side of Carter's head wishing it would explode. That's just stupid.

"What about prom night?" I asked gruffly.

"God! When you came in my friends started saying how cute and good you looked and when my eyes landed on you my breath caught in my throat, my heart just started speeding away. Lisa shouted to you that you looked handsome and all my friends agreed even the guys and I just saw red. We were heading off to college and all I thought was that other guys would see how beautiful you are and I would lose you. I don't know why I said all those things to you. I regretted that the most. I hate that I ruined what was supposed to be your special night. I'm sorry." I felt something wet splash the back of my hand.

Oh God, Carter was crying. He sniffed, "I'm so sorry Johnathan. I understand if you never want to see me again. You probably hate me huh?" he laughed humorlessly wiping at his eyes.

"Hate is a strong word Carter. Maybe really dislike," I murmured earning a real chuckle from him. I snuggled closer to him as we sat in silence. Christina Aguilera's Bound To You playing softly through my speakers. Before I knew it my eyes kept drooping until they were completely shut.

 Before I knew it my eyes kept drooping until they were completely shut

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A/N

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