Incite Me

Chapter 11

"No..." A distant mumble echoed in my ears in the middle of the night, "Father, please!"

The words went louder and hoarser, to the point I couldn't take it any more. I blinked and frayed out of a deep dreamless sleep to find Dorian on a double mattress next to my bed sprawled across his sheets, sweat glistening on his furrowed forehead.

"No!" He screamed and gasped for air then sat up straight, looking sallow.

Panting heavily, he looked at me as I leaned over the edge of my bed to see if he was ok.

"Samantha." He breathed out, "I'm sorry if I woke you up."

"What was that?" I asked, feeling wide-awake all of a sudden.

"Nightmare..." Dorian exhaled and combed his fingers over his wet hair, "A nightmare I have every single fucking night."

I stretched my hand for a glass of water I kept on the nightstand next to bed and passed it over to him. Dorian emptied its entire content in several big gulps, then exhaled loudly and fell back on the soft mattress. He brought his hands behind the head and stared into the ceiling. His breathing steadied into a slow wheezing. "I keep finding myself in the same dream over and over, every night." He spoke quietly." Father locks me up in the basement and I hear him throw the key into a metal plate he kept next to the door. I scream and kick, begging for him to let me out but he'd disappear for the entire day until my mother comes back from work. Then he'd let me out and holding a screw driver up to my neck, breathes out to stay quiet otherwise he'd kill me."

I made myself comfortable lying on my stomach to have a better view of Dorian, with my hands just beneath my chin.

Dorian continued. "I relive my worst moments of the past every night as a reminder that I shouldn't forget who I really am - a weak and useless boy. I lied when I said I'm stronger than ever..." He sighed heavily in the silence of the night.

A bleak streetlight came shining through the curtains and onto his lips, streaking a fine line up to his torso. Dorian turned his head at me with eyes full of regretful tears. "I can't run away from something that's imbedded in my veins."

"But you're not weak and definitely not useless." I tried to soothe him but figured I'm not at my best to do so. We were both too broken to find peace and comfort in each other.

Dorian stared at me for few more minutes, studying my face in the dim of the night, then turned his back on me. I should have said something else to reassure him, to offer advice but I wasn't strong enough.

"Pss!" Ian peaked his head through the doorway into my room at a little past five in the morning. I arose up on my elbows, instantly feeling the bandage at the back of my head. It started to ache all of a sudden as soon as I tilted my head off the pillow.

"Hey." I whispered quietly, checking on Dorian. His chest was rhythmically moving up and down, I didn't want to wake him.

Quickly sliding out of bed, I ran to Ian on my toes then slowly shut the doors behind me.

"How did last night go?" Ian took my hand and led me to his room.

I wriggled under the cold covers in his bed. He just came back from work up in the night bar, looking scruffy with huge dark circles under his eyes.

"It could have been better to be honest." I propped my hand under my left cheek and rolled into the ball, patting the empty side of the bed for him to crawl in.

"Gotta take a shower." Ian loosened his jeans uncovering a tiny abs line and a thick D&G logo on his trunks.

"Sit, I'll tell you everything before I gotta go make breakfast. I'm leaving to L.A. with Dorian in few hours." I patted on the mattress once more before Ian sat next to me, brushing a strand of hair out of my face. "Daniel was here last night."