Gang Shit (COMPLETED)

1: losses

Alexa in mm / ik the name don't match the face I address this later inna book💀

Before we get started: if you wanted one of those books with a dumbass lead.. THIS AINT THAT!!! She not bouta get cheated on 5x, leave, get pregnant, take him back, then they live happily ever after. I've seen way too many of those books. THIS IS NOT SHADE towards those types of books cause they be entertaining SOMETIMES, but it also gets tiring.

Also, this book is copyrighted blah blah blah. Same shit you always hear. Warning: it includes profanity, mild violence, and health issues.

This my first book so feel free to leave constructive criticism, but don't be rude cause ima reply.💀 If you see me inna comments, mind ya bitness😂😂! That's all folks, let's get into it...

ALEXA POV
*5 years ago*

I was laying in my room listening to music when my father entered my room crying , my brother was right behind him looking like he was holding back tears.

"What's wrong?" I asked trying not to think the worst

"It's your mom.. sh-she passed away" my dad say now on the floor sobbing

"NO YOUR LYING, she was just here ! She's fine! I'm gonna call her right now, why are you lying to me" I yelled with tears running down my face as I called my mom. Sure enough she didn't answer.

She's gone kept repeating in my head, my mom was my other half. I don't know how to live in a world that she's not in. I felt like my world shattered. This ain't fair man. She's my bestfriend, my role model, my inspiration, and so much more. How can I go on when the other half of my heart isn't here. I was on the floor sobbing trying to get my thoughts together. I never thought I'd feel pain like this. I started to question the God she believed in so much because what kind of God would do this?

My brother Andre gave me a hug and we both sat in my room and crying over our loss for what felt like forever. Later that night we began to reminisce over our favorite memories with our mom. Which often led to more tears but we still did it the entire night.

Meanwhile, our dad was nowhere to be found. I understand he lost his wife but he had two kids to think about. It's okay though because we have eachother and he'll be back by morning.

*1 month after the news*
It was the 3rd time this week dad care home drunk out of his mind, it's also the first time we've seen him in two days. Andre's had to turn to selling drugs to make sure we have something to eat. I cook and take care of the house while he works to provide for us.

After the news of what happened to mom Dad's been coming home drunk and at random times of the night. We've tried to help him multiple times but he won't listen. We even drove him to rehab against his will and he still refused help.

He decided that alcohol was better then dealing with his loss, a part of me thinks he's selfish. The other part of me thinks he needs help, but we've tried countless times each time worse than the other. I understand he lost his wife but why won't he take care of us? Does he not love us? Why does it feel like we lost two parents? Why are Andre and Rose the only ones here for me? I constantly question why this happened, we were a perfect family. We didn't have it all but we had love, now it's like me and Andre are fending for ourselves. I feel bad that Andre has to give up things to care for me. He's a child himself yet I'm his priority. He's doing my fathers job and that isn't fair to him.

Mom's rolling in her grave if she can see this. I know she'd be proud of me and Andre for looking after eachother but she'd be pissed at dad. I know she wouldn't want me having to do everything around the house and Andre being our provider while dad drinks his life away, but life happens.

One bottle. One bottle was all it took for dad to want more. One bottle was all it took for him to forget about us. One bottle turned into so many bottles I can't keep track. Each day he's here I find myself throwing away bottles of various alcohols.

Apart from that, since the loss I haven't been the same. I'm not as outspoken, in fact I've only talked to my brother and my bestfriend Rose.

* A few months later*
For almost a year Andre has continued to take care of both of us. He had to drop out of school because dads more and more out of his mind, he doesn't even pay for the house anymore. Andre's coming up in the drug game and he's been making more than enough money to keep us afloat. I offered to get a job but he wants me to focus on school, so that's what I do. I think since he takes care of me the least I could do is follow his rules. Even through all this we've managed to stay close, my brothers the most important thing in my life and I don't think I could live without him. If anything we're closer than ever.

As usual Dad came home drunk again. He stumbled through the house smelling of alcohol, I'm guessing he's been cross-fading because yesterday I saw him doing cocaine. Lately he's been asking Andre for money so I'm guessing he ran through him and moms savings, Andre refuses to help him kill him self though so neither of us give him money.

"ALEXA" my dad yelled through the house knocking me out of my thoughts. A part of me is scared to go down there but hey what's the worse that could happen.

"yes?" I asked still confused on what he wants because he usually ignores us unless he wants something.

"Do you have any money I can borrow?"

"No sir" I love how he said borrow like he got money to pay someone back. Don't know why I called him a sir either cause he doesn't deserve my respect.

"YOUR SO FUCKING USELESS" his voice boomed through the house as he threw an empty bottle of Hennessy at me. I dodged it and my eyes went wide, he's never gotten this aggressive before and Andre isn't home.

I started to slowly back away hoping he wouldn't follow me. As soon as I made it halfway up the stairs he was behind me dragging me back down the stairs. "LET GO YOUR HURTING ME" I yelled grabbing air trying to grab the railing.

He started to hit me over and over again. I tried my hardest to hit back but even when he was in his drunken state he's still stronger.
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When he was done I just laid there. There was a little bit of blood from some of my wounds, I could see some of the bruises that covered my body. I've never felt so helpless before.

"IF YOU WONT HELP ME WILLINGLY ILL MAKE SURE YOU HELP" he yelled before leaving out the house

About a half hour later I finally got enough strength to crawl up the stairs. I made it to my phone and called Andre. As soon as the call went through I started sobbing, stuttering trying to tell him what happened.

"Lex you have to calm down I don't know what your saying, what's wrong? Do you need me to come home?"

"yes, it's da-dad" before I could finish the phone was ripped from my hand. My dad came in with a big man behind him "this is her?" he asked and my father nodded. The man handed him some drugs and my father left the room. I was confused but I tried to leave the room too cause that was weird. As soon as I put my hand on my door know I was dragged back. He ripped off my clothes, whispering disgusting things as I screamed for him to stop. He inserted himself in me and I cried, kicking, screaming, punching, scraping, biting, but nothing got him off of me.
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Minutes later Andre came rushing to my room. He yanked the man off of me, beat him up, then shot him in his dome. He cleaned me off and got me to stop crying. I've never seen him so mad in my entire life. I told him what happened and he was about to go search for dad to kill him too, but I begged him not to. He started to pack all our bags. We finished in about 2.5 hours after I convinced him to let me help pack. We slept in a hotel that night and the next day we were in a new house. He wrote a email to my teachers saying I had the flu, so I'd be excused from school while I heal.
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From that moment on it was me & Andre against the world and Rose tagged along for the ride. Now that's my family💕.
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