Your Warmth ls My Only Elixer Now

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Josh audibly sighed before delving into the "actual talk," saying, “Those 5 hours I searched for you, I was scared you had taken your life. What were you even thinking, Shivi? Until I found you, my heart was in my hand. For 22 years, I lived without knowing you existed, but the thought of even 22 seconds without you now sends me into a panic.”

As Shivi hugged him, sobbing, Josh cupped her face, put his forehead on hers, and rubbed his thumb on her cheek.

His voice broke as he said, “Don’t say sorry. No matter what happens, you will never think about ending your life. If you put an end to your breathing, I swear I might end up doing the same.”

Shivi shed more tears, saying, “Sorry, I felt I didn't have a reason to live.”

Josh snapped back, “Dammit, but I want you to be the reason I breathe.”

He put her palm on his chest and looked at her, his heart racing.

Shivi exclaimed, “No… this is not happening…”

Josh stammered, “Do you… Do you feel that? I feel this every moment I am around you or even when I think about you. And I know your heart is racing at a higher speed than my own heart.”

Shivi softly put her hands on his mouth, urging him not to say more, and shut her eyes tightly, weeping profusely. She knew what he was going to say. “Shhhh… please don’t say it... please…” He removed her hand to say the thing he wanted to tell her for a long time.

Josh gently kissed her hand. “I am going to. You will have to hear it. And I am not saying this expecting anything in return, but you have to know what is there in my heart.” He kissed her softly on her lips, and she tried to step back.

Shivi attempted one last time to stop him, “Josh… please…don’t… please…. please..I beg you.” He pulled her back to embrace and held her tightly by her waist. He looked into the almond-shaped eyes of hers.

Josh paused for a moment. There was complete silence, or probably just the sounds of their racing hearts. “I love you… I love you so much. I want you to be just mine. I want to make you go crimson all day, every day. I will wait until the timing is right, until the stars are perfectly aligned, and you are ready to accept me, my love. Take your time, think with a clear mind, I will wait, because for me, you are worth every wait, every fight. Just trust me once so that I can really show what true love feels like. I will spend an eternity loving you, caring for you, and most of all, respecting you, showing you every day that I hold you as high as any bright star in the sky.”

He wiped the tears that were flowing from her eyes. His touch acted like medicine to her broken heart. “I really want to show you how respectfully you should be treated. You deserve much more, and I want to give it to you, all of it. I know you are a bright girl who will get so many job offers and achieve a lot of things in life. I want to be there when you conquer the entire world. I want to be there to celebrate your success. Someday you will be giving an interview to the media, and I would be whistling for you from the audience, and you would say I thank my husband for being supportive and call me to the stage.”

She chuckled amid her tears, when he said, “I want to be there when you smile, laugh, cry, and feel pain. Please…”

She pushed him apart gently and took a step back. Shivi wiped her tears from her eyes and said, “Josh, you are too good, but I cannot agree with this, you know, right? As much as I want to, I cannot. My existence doesn’t matter to my parents, but I cannot take decisions ignoring them. I value them, irrespective of how they treat me. If I behave like them, what is the difference between me and them?”

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