Canvas of Love | TxS

46 - empty promises

- Maddy -

I kept pacing back and forth, my mind so occupied that i just couldn't think of a way to phrase the question i'll ask Lauren.

Yesterday night felt too real. Did i hallucinate it? Yes. But i still can't forget about it. What if that was a sign? What if she's lying to me about being away only because of work? And what if her call before i left to the club was an emergency? I'm not gonna be able to forgive myself if something has happened to her.

I finally grabbed my phone from the bed and brought up Lauren's number. Taking in fewer breaths before pressing call.

- Lauren -

My eyes slowly opened and i picked my head up from my hands, the vibration of my phone going off in my pocket yet i examined as my mom was wide awake, staring at the tv from laying in her bed.

"Rise and shine." Hannah took acknowledge of me moving. "Didn't have to stick by my bed all night. Not like i'd have a heart attack when i'm resting." She kept going.

"Wanted to make sure. Only right after seeing you collapse so suddenly yesterday night." I commented but discreet made it seem as i'm just checking the time however seeing that the call was from Maddy, had me stand up from the chair right away.

"Uhh, do you want anything? Coffee? Breakfast?" I slowly made my way to the bedroom door, asking. "Sure? If you can, bring me both. The doctor won't be able to make it here before 12 pm so i don't wanna starve until then."

"On it." I responded and headed straight out the room but before i could answer my girlfriend's call, it ended. I rushed down the hallway and further away from being heard before calling her back.

"Oh my god! Lauren! I thought- You're okay, right? Why didn't you answer the first time?" Maddy's voice immediately came through but feeling happy about hearing her after these days was the last emotion that filled me from how much worry was in her tone.

"I'm okay? Why? Maddy, you hadn't answered me yesterday either so i'm worried about you too."

"I- uhh, needed to take a longer shift so i was at work plus forgot to call you back afterwards, was late anyways. This time i should be the one apologizing." I heard her explain but all i did was smile from just hearing her talk.

"Maddy, i miss you." I faintly spoke out, feeling such a mix of sadness but happiness. "How much longer? Babe, how long are you gonna make me wait?" She faintly spoke back.

"God, sweetheart," my hand went up, rubbing across my face with such frustration from knowing that my answer will break her apart, "just a little bit more. Please, love, don't be mad at me. This time my time away is the most urgent and important."

"Is it because of me?" Her question came through and i was about to speak but Maddy kept going, "i'm sorry. I'm actually sorry for making you feel guilty of not showcasing enough love for me. Lauren, you had been doing it. With everything - trip to Switzerland, gifts, restaurants. I was the dumb one that i guess wanted something more romantic, well something.. different. More unusual and special."

"Maddy, i'll be back next weekend. I promise you that. I'll do everything i can as fast as possible here in England and i'm coming back to you right after." I confessed, knowing deep down that this is most likely an empty promise but her words made me want to fight over my mother opinion about this relationship, make her stop controlling my life and using her condition as a reason to make me stay away from Maddy.

"Promise? Lauren, do you actually promise?"

God. What have i gotten myself into. I'm destroying my poor girl to the fullest.

"Maddy, whilst i'm still gonna be away, please don't do dumb stuff." I commented not only to dodge her question but to also make sure she's is and will be doing okay.

"Why did you ignore me? Lauren, promise me about coming back in a week. Say it."

"Maddy, i want you to promise me something too."

"I'm not promising you shit if you're not going to come back. Lauren, you've already been away for close to two weeks. Say that you actually miss me and finally make me as your priority because i'm done. I swear i'll be done if you don't do it."

"Sweetheart, you're not about to relapse. I'm not letting you get to that point no matter what we're going through!"

"Lauren, i hate you. One moment you say something and the next you act like you didn't. But let me phrase it better incase i was unclear of what i have understood. You've became a liar, Lauren." Maddy said but before i could respond, she cut the call off.

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