When I Met Him

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝟏

𝐅Inally done with my class eleven & now I get to go one step ahead to my dreams. After class twelve I am planning to join research programmed center or something like that as I think it might be the best option for an enthusiast like me which is the reason I took science after SSC.

What? Not every person who takes science wants to be a doctor or Engineer okay? some people like me have different priorities & mine is still a mystery to me too.... sometimes I think I might be better in some astronomy stuffs, but I don't like their suit plus they are very disciplined which I am not & can never be! So now by cutting every possible career option like this I am left with just two options, either I become a doctor or do something in research field.

Today I am going in an academy for admission purpose as I would really need classes for HSC & competitive exams as well. My boyfriend suggested me to enroll in the same academy where he is planning to go so here, I go following him blindly.
My boyfriend & I met each other during our annual day function practice sessions where him & I were dance performers of different dance groups. A friend of mine introduced him to me, his name is Ashfaque & then after a month of knowing each other we started. YUP! people take more time to know each other than I took for commitment. But as usual, boys don't value love and emotions unless & until they are attached which is why he never loved me the way I wanted him to. But I am the dumbest girl one could ever meet so AHH SHIT! HERE WE GO AGAIN!
Me & my boyfriend have so much distance between us that he never cares about. He is in commerce department & I am in science. Also, all my friends are in commerce department so ninety percent of the time I am all alone in college. He never makes time for me; we never go out on a date or something at least to be called closed to a 'date'. It feels like I am a burden to him, but I pray he soon realizes what he should be doing in a relationship. It has only been three months we got into a relationship & still it feels like he is done with me already. And now that I can feel it, I have decided to go with the flow if he is so ignorant why should I put all the efforts every damn time. Everyone deserves love without feeling like they are begging for it.

Also, because I am taking admissions to this academy, I forced my best friend too! Her name is Komal. She is my only friend literally from second class when we were not able to talk properly, from then, till now, she was always here for me. We study in different colleges so taking admissions at the same academy will reunite us at the end of the day. I hope everything goes well for me & my best friend I love her so much! She was with me when nobody else was. I was not always this confident girl that I am today neither I was good at studies, nor I had anything special to hold me unique, but she somehow managed to shape me well. Some people think we give each other so much credit but honestly if I remove 'her' part from my school life I will be left with nothing, she is that important to me. I just hope we do well in our HSC as we did in SSC together.   

2 Days Later

I am going to start my academy from today. Nervous? hell yes! This is the first time I am taking classes. For my entire childhood my mom always sent me to tuitions that too in our building where I already knew almost everyone, so I never faced nervousness there, but this is vice versa. Thank God I forced Komal to take admissions here now she is the only person I know in this academy at least I'll have a shoulder to blame all my nervousness on. She is 'not too shy' type girl from the beginning. I don't know I am so nervous yet so excited to meet new people from my field, my mindset. FEEL ME!

And I am just on my way there, almost there & now my nervousness is at its peak! & I should call Komal just to make sure I am not the only one so nervous right now. "Where are you? don't tell me you are already late on your first day? "I ask her. "Or even worse.... I am not coming" she says in a low tone. "What are you kidding me? when were you going to tell me this? and why the hell are you now coming?" I ask so many questions in one go. "I was about to tell you but then I got carried away with a few chores & then my bulb fused...the thing is I am going to village to see my father he is not well, and I suddenly had to leave I am sorry" she informs me. "Don't be sorry, it's okay take care of him & please be back soon because I have no clue what I am going to do without you here...bye take care!" I say disconnecting the call.

Now I am standing here alone questioning my existence literally why I am so nervous it's just PEOPLE! what can go wrong? I am trying to convince myself, 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺'𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦, 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺? 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘢𝘴𝘬 𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵? 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘪 𝘢𝘮 𝘥𝘶𝘮𝘣? Damn them I'll be myself I don't care whatever happens.

As soon as I reached the academy, I see people already waiting in the class and surprise surprise they are waiting for me. YES! I am the one who is late on her first day THANKYOU NERVOUSNESS! I asks my permission to go in and after scanning the whole room I find an empty bench as my Saviour & settle myself on it. The lecturer has begun to ask everyone to give their introductions & it is at this moment my social anxiety reached to its maximum. Luckily, I am sitting at the last bench trying my best not to make any eye contact with anyone. Everyone introduced themselves now it's just me and one more boy sitting on the right side of my bench alongside with me are left. So, the lecturer points at him to introduce himself & till now I haven't even raised my head to look at anyone who introduced themselves. "Myself Shaad Shaikh" He introduce himself & now it's my turn I have to raise my head & SPEAK! "Myself Muskan Ansari" I spoke in a low tone under confidently for the first time otherwise I am the loudest person in the room every time.