Sperm Donor | k.sj

Chapter 9

Pain.

Suffering.

Torture.

Sheer agony.

Those are the words I'd use to describe the horror that is morning sickness.

It's like a demon just takes over your body and rips your stomach to shreds.

This morning was no different.

I was rolling around, peacefully dreaming about some weird love story where a girl meets her future husband at some fish shack, when I subconsciously felt the heavy churning in my stomach.

My eyes shot open as I groggily tried to gauge my surroundings.

I rolled onto my side to check my phone for the time.

"Ugh, please just go away," I pleaded, turning on my side in an attempt to ignore the pain.

I curled up into a ball, praying that the feeling would just go away, but that was never the case with morning sickness.

In all honesty, I was exactly being truthful about everything to Seokjin. I felt like everything he had done for me was enough and so adding on the headache of catering to morning sickness, I just couldn't bear the thought of being a burden. Lately, some of the triggers for sickness for me was the smell and taste of cheese and fish. I couldn't stand it. So every time we happened to eat it or it happened to be placed in front of me, I'd run away to the bathroom for a while, vomit for like ten minutes, and then sit there for another fifteen because I felt so utterly weak, and then I'd come back and pretend that I was just peeing for a long time.

I didn't want to be so helpless. My whole adult life, I grew accustomed to my own hard work. The only way my well being will thrive is if I take care of myself.

A wave of nausea shot threw my body, causing me to gag violently.

My hand clamped over my mouth while I hurriedly got out of bed and scrambled to the bathroom.

I dropped to my knees and held my hair back while hovering my head over the toilet bowl.

And then I let it rip. The thing was my weight was supposed to go up slightly but with how much I'd been vomiting, my weight had stayed stagnant.

This case of morning sickness was particularly bad for some reason. I felt weak and lightheaded. The room was spinning and I was barely keeping my head directly over the toilet bowl.

A few tears slipped down my face as I tried to suppress the pain and exhaustion in my body.

After about ten minutes, I felt a tiny bit better. In the sense that I wasn't nauseous anymore, but the aftermath of it was far worse.

I weakly flushed down all the vomit and held onto the sink tightly to pull myself up.

It was terrible. I wobbled on my feet as I tried to wash my hands and clean my mouth. I gripped the sink tightly as I brushed my teeth to get rid of the obvious stink. This was my own problem and I could handle it.

Well...maybe not this time.

Once I brushed my teeth, I felt my knees buckle. I held the sink as I slowly lowered myself onto the ground.

I leaned against the bathtub while weakly hugging myself.

I kept whimpering to cope with the pain and to make sure I stayed awake. After lots of research, I found out that this wasn't exactly anything to be worried about so I just decided to handle it on my own. It'd pass eventually.

I didn't want anyone to know. This was my burden, and mine alone.

Seokjin POV

I was up rather early in the morning because I had some work that I needed to do in my study.