Ruin Me

4. Forgive me

"Cara, what the hell was that outside?" dad didn't even wait for Grey to disappear before he was yelling at me too. These raised voices were causing a headache to form right at the front of my brain. All I wanted to do was curl up in bed.

"What?" I played the innocent girl card with a one shoulder shrug.

"Who is that boy, your boyfriend?" Dad demanded. Jenson was as far from my boyfriend as you could get but I was just so angry at my dad that I went with it,

"Seriously?" my whole body started to shake with the injustice of everything, "you don't see me for fifteen years and you care who I'm dating? You can't pick and choose when you want to be my dad."

I'd been so caught up in the moment that I'd completely forgotten Mitchell, Nico and Sawyer were right behind me but after my words I heard one of them suck in a gasp. Dads eyes flicked up to them.

"We'll leave you to it," I heard Mitch whisper apologetically and several pairs of feet started to shuffle away slowly.

"Don't bother," my voice cut clean and clear through the silence, "I'll go, I can see when I'm not wanted," I shot the man who wanted to call himself my dad one final loathing glare before I hissed, "trust me I'll be gone the second I can and you'll never have to see me again, just like you want."

I didn't give him time to reply before I pivoted on my heel letting my long hair fly in his face as a strutted down the corridor to my new room.

"Cara," I heard my dad try meekly but I was already slamming the door to my room behind me with a satisfying thud. As much as I hated to admit it, Grey was right about lashing out, it did help a little. Not as much as I would've liked though because I could still feel the ache in my heart as I leant against the door panting out all my bottled up rage.

I really wanted to punch something .

Instead I did what my mom always did when she was angry at some gambler who'd conned her out of a game. I sucked in a long deep breath and let it extinguish the raging fire building up inside me. Then I breathed out all the smoke from the flames. Finally, I plastered on a fake, joyous smile like I had no cares in the world, tilted my chin up confidently and straightened my back so I was standing to my full height, shoulders back, legs squared. Ready.

Now calm enough, I scanned the place that I had to live in until my eighteenth birthday in January, three whole months away.

The room was small but cosy, the same cream walls and dark wood floor as outside spread into the room. There were only four wooden pieces of furniture dotted around the place, a desk with a chair, a wardrobe and a twin bed. Above the bed was a small rectangular window with royal red curtains matching the red comforter on the bed. A couple of shelves ran along the wall above the desk and a circular mirror hung next to a door I presumed led to a bathroom. My suspicions were confirmed when I pushed the door open, behind was a cramped white tiled bathroom containing a toilet, sink and shower. I was thankful for the tiny space and necessities though, as now I wouldn't have to share a bathroom with any boys.

I surveyed the bare, lifeless room again, it was just like every hotel room I'd stayed in. Practical but simple and impersonal. I found something comforting about that though, the ambiguity of the room, like I could become anyone I wanted within the walls.

I dropped my heavy hold all and rack sack on the twin bed glad to be releasing their weight from my shoulders. Then as I'd done hundreds of times before I unpacked my life out of my two bags into the room.