Mr. Wallis

Part 21

Throughout the rest of the BBQ, Mathew did do as he promised, though, he still managed to startle me with random pokes and holds.

"I feel as if mayyybe I should apologize." I said while throwing away the paper plates in the recycling bin. The guests had all left, and Mathew decided to stay and help clean. It seemed like a perfect moment to fess up that I had overreacted.

"Maybe?" He raised a brow, then handed me another trash bag. "Not to be captious, but you make quite a fuss without explaining why."

I could have start another FUSS right now. I eye him like a vulture, but instead I blew the steam out my ears. He was right. Though, I never had acted like this before.

"Because of you... you make me react like this because..." I admitted he had stirred something in my stomach, but kept my eyes at the trash bin. If I wanted all my words out, then I had to avoid eye contact -or else I'd freeze up again. Then I quickly sped through my sentence, "okay-so-yes we have to pretend and all, but I can't help but feel certain emotions. You know, these are new to me, I am doing my best to deal with them."

He closed the grill after dumping the ashes into a bag. I waited with my mouth twisted till he decided to reply. Please, don't call me silly girl. Please, don't do it. Because then...I will really feel silly. Silly and stupid for trusting you.

"Tell me when you are about to run away. Then, Lania," he took my arm and placed his other hand over mine. "Run to me, and I will calm you."

My face did it again; it burst into colors. Are you serious? You must be joking. Clearly, right? HE MUST BE joking. Why would you do that to me? You? Calm me? I asked mentally while he smiled at the awkward smile plastered on my face.

"Because, dear, Ms. Kett." He leaned in, then whispered, "that is what couples do."

"O-okay. I get it." I said looking away.

Mathew stood back up straight. He still had a hold of my hand, and I felt it tighten.

"Lania, kissing, hugging, touching, it is not all there is to dating. You should know that."

"I do. I just don't know how to," I escape his hands, and swing my arms around. It seems as if I were trying to zap objects with my nonexsisting powers. "-how to show it. How to run to someone's arms or-"

While I had my arms up as if cheering for a V, he took the chance to hug me.

I shrieked, but not loud enough for my mother to come rushing in. "Plea-Mathew!"

"Stop, and take it in."

"I can't." I tried squirming out of his chest and arms, but to no avail. Why couldn't you have been Peter? I know for a fact I could have taken him down!

Mathew again told me to stop. He wanted me to become used to his body. Then he said it.

"Trust in me."

I stopped, and my ears wanted to refuse those words. I did trust him, but perhaps not fully. Maybe it was just Kurt who I trusted enough. But..this was not Kurt. This was Mathew. Do I want to even trust him? No, no. I pushed the thoughts back. Of course I did. I knew I could trust him, because why else would I allow him near?

Slowly I wrapped my arms around his back, breathed in and out deeply, then calmed my mind.

"Your heart is beating like a drum." he chuckled into my ear.

"Just be quiet. I'm trying here to like your presence."

"Hmm."

"And it's not just my heart. Yours as well." I exhaled while closing my eyes. This is beyond awkward, and the hug seems more of one given to someone you haven't seen in years, but...it was nice. This is the warmest place on earth right now. Are all couples like this?

After a couple of minutes, I rested my chin on his chest, and looked up to him. I told him he was the most annoying man I had ever met, and that chances are I would have kicked his ass out of my life if it wasn't for his father.

"Careful. It sounds as if you adore me, silly girl."

I look down, then ball up my fists. Quickly, I raise my knee, jabbing him right in the privates. He crouches down, and groans how unlady-like that was of me.

"Keep calling me that, you ass. I'll see you tomorrow!" I smile and wave while walking into the house. I close the door, muttering, "You are going break my heart, aren't you?"

I don't know why, but somehow I smiled at that thought.