Chapter 73: The Season

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Loren's POV

With blurred vision, I looked up into the rear view mirror and watched as a dark figure emerged from the building and ran into the darkened road. I

"Fuck" I cursed at the world for making me bump into the server, now Killian knew that I had seen him. 

"Come on" I impatiently muttered at the red stoplight as I wiped another tear from my eyes. I looked to my left and right and realized nobody else was approaching the intersection so I pressed my foot down on the gas again and sped off. I glanced back into the rearview mirror and watched as Killian stopped and stood still in the middle of the road, his figure disappearing almost instantly. At that moment I looked down at the speedometer and realized that I was going eighty miles per hour. 

I didn't know where I was going or what I was going to do. I had absolutely no plan at this point. All I knew was that I needed to get away from Killian and any of his excuses that he might have. What excuse would he even make for this? What reason could he have?

I couldn't believe it. The one man I let into my life after Bryce... the one man I left break my promise to myself. And he fucked me over exactly like how Bryce did. How stupid could I be to let this happen? My dad was right.. Killian was showering me in all of the glam because he was hiding something. 

My encounter with Vivian from earlier in the day replayed in my head along with their kiss, over and over again. 

Vivian was right. Killian didn't belong with somebody like me. He belonged with somebody just as evil as he was. 

Another sob escaped my mouth as my thoughts overwhelmed my judgement. I couldn't go back to my house because I was renting it out. I couldn't get a hotel because I was still traumatized from what had happened in London. I had no choice but to go back to the apartment. I just hoped that he wasn't there yet. 

I raced across the city, not paying much attention to my speed, and finally pulled into the garage. I sighed with relief when I saw that Killian's Audi was still gone. I rushed out of the car and to the elevator where I anxiously waited for it to open. Once the elevator door had shut, a wave of relief rushed over me. 

I couldn't face Killian tonight. I didn't even know if I could ever face him. My worst habit was avoiding my problems and this... well this was a problem I desperately wanted to avoid. I would figure out what I was going to do tonight but for now, I would have to spend another night in the apartment. 

The elevator doors opened to reveal a dark and quiet apartment. On the table at the entrance sat a package and a manila envelope, where George would typically leave our mail. I walked over to the items, Killian's name was on the box and mine on the envelope. I grabbed the envelope and made my way up to the bedroom that I had stayed in when I first started to stay at Killian's apartment, locking the door behind me. 

I tossed the envelope, my purse, and jacket onto the bed and walked into the bathroom to start the shower. I angrily kicked my heels and tore the dress that I had carefully picked out just hours ago off and threw it onto the ground.

My eyes shut as I leaned my back against the shower wall and let the water beat my body. I laid my head on my arms as an overwhelming sense of defeat overtook me. My body shook uncontrollably as I was finally able to fully feel my emotions. 

Rocking back and forth, my brain replayed every single thing that had happened since I met Killian. From our first date at Marty's to the night in his office when he apologized profusely for taking things too far in Destin. Eventually my body calmed as I numbed myself to my feelings and I laid under the water that had since turned cold.

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